POV: you are insecure about your weight and looks !(you shouldn't be)

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wake up in the morning and stare at the mirror,
"thankgod I skipped meal yesterday" as I looked thinner.
go to school or not but don't talk to someone new,
cuz what if they point out that insecurity of you?
don't go to a party or your friend's home,
and if you do, you'll end up feeling alone.
put some makeup on just for a minute to look slightly pretty,
yet you can't do that outside, you say "I know they'll judge me".
scroll through Pinterest to look at those hourglass body and clear skin,
stop without starting because against those besties,how could u ever win?.
please don't you smile - that's ugly,
I mean your teeth look scary .
set alarm and workout every single day,
"that will help" that's what they all say.
but that's not helping you almost passed out 2 days ago,
right now your face looks pale when it was supposed to glow.
But I know you wouldn't stop torturing yourself,
cuz you were taught that it would never HELP.
They know they should stop insulting you like this but they won't,
again you will go to bed with a stomach full with nothing but taunt.

(poet's note - hey, this is my first time on this platform but I hope you are doing well and if you can relate to this poem, I just wanted to tell you that you're really beautiful! I'm damn sure you are , whatever it is , I know you can make it out alive :) 🤎