Let me believe that I have no way out of this.
Let me believe I'm stuck like this if I don't fix my ways.
Let me believe that the more I do the longer I suffer,
Well that won't be a problem now would it?
I torture myself each and every day,
Over and over again,
With guilt and humiliation.
Damn it!
Nobody's perfect right?
But neither are they imperfect for I take over all that duties.
Righteousness will not get in my body for I shove it away each chance I get,
Yet day after day I cry before the Lord in seeking of it.
What the hell!!
Let me belive that I'll be snatched in pain with those sinners, all together with those who are bloodthirsty.
Cause it's not like I make effort to change that, so maybe I deserve it.
Maybe I deserve to burn alone.
Maybe I do deserve to be abandoned.
Maybe I do belive that I'm not worthy of anything, for what kind of selfish most disrespectful one who takes advantage deserves to be in His presence?

Let me just believe that forgiveness I will not receive,
So that sins may scatter away from me as I hate them with passion.

© JansenB