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Sombre
Sombre
A feeling of deep seriousness and sadness as defined by Google
Synonymous to solemn, grave, sober and gloom to name a few
What we don't talk about though is the actual feeling
The feeling of your favorite show coming to an end as a child
The knowledge even at that age that you'll never get to see them again
You'll never see the bright faces of those actors that always made you smile ever again
You'll never get to experience the joy that those animated characters brought to your heart even on the worst days
The feeling that you're actually growing up.
Sombre
The strong presence that hits you when you realize that University is no longer a dream, but a reality that is just three months away
The overwhelming pain you feel when you think about how there would now be a distance between you and the schoolmates that you hated so much
Or at least, you thought you did
The hit of stupidity you feel when you watch videos of your school days and know that you'd miss them
But how could you miss them
How could you miss all the fights and arguments
All the rumors and gossiping
All the blocking and unfollowing
It's impossible right?
But here you are
Sitting down and remembering all the laughs you had
All the adventures you went on together
Knowing that they would be nothing but memories in a short time to come.
Sombre
The end of a relationship
The end of something you enjoyed so much
The end of all the escapades you went on together
The end of all the fights you fought together
The end of the confidence that you built together
The end of the thoughts, gifts and secrets you shared together
The end of the bond you had
The end of the way that you looked at each other
The end of the heart palpitations you felt whenever you even as little as heard their name
The knowledge that even with all the great parts, it brought the end of the not-so-great parts
It brought the end of the arguments
The end of the feeling of jealousy whenever they spoke to anyone else
The end of the doubts and second thoughts of if you were actually meant to be
The end of the cringe in your guts and the saltiness on the back of your tongue any time you imagined how it would end
And it brought also, the feeling of both relief and sadness when it all did end
But never the way you imagined
Leaving all you had as your bittersweet past.
Sombre
The glass-shattering screams when you receive a call that a loved one has died
The numbness and complete dissociation that you experience for days while trying to actually come to terms with it
The anger at everything
At death for taking them
At the world for letting them go
At earth for not rejecting their body and returning them alive and healthy
The anger at them for leaving you
The feeling of doubt and disbelief
The thoughts of "but they can't be gone"
That grandma who you shared words of wisdom with just last night can't have departed
That mom who you had a hearty dinner with just two weeks ago can't be late
That brother who you just went to a Laker's match with last weekend can't have flatlined
That baby who you'd just given a kiss on the cheek an hour ago can't have suffocated
That none of this happened
That it was all just a nightmare
A nightmare that was oddly long
A nightmare that's confirmed to be reality the moment the first few grams of soil topple onto their coffin
The hit of pain as fate forces you to let go of someone that a part of you thought would be around forever
As you commit them to memory as not a loved one, but as a cherished one.
Sombre
The sound of the car crashing
The light of the sparks as they turn into flames, then a raging fire
The beep-beep-beeeeeep of the heart monitor as your heart reaches a stop
The going in and out of consciousness as you realize that this is it
As you acknowledge the pain that your death would bring about
As you experience what you can never explain to anyone
As your brain plays the seven minutes of your best memories
As you think about all the things you could have done if you didn't care so much what others thought
As you think of all the apologies you never received and all the sorrys you never got to say
The complete powerlessness you feel as you finally submit your soul to the forces of the universe.
© All Rights Reserved
A feeling of deep seriousness and sadness as defined by Google
Synonymous to solemn, grave, sober and gloom to name a few
What we don't talk about though is the actual feeling
The feeling of your favorite show coming to an end as a child
The knowledge even at that age that you'll never get to see them again
You'll never see the bright faces of those actors that always made you smile ever again
You'll never get to experience the joy that those animated characters brought to your heart even on the worst days
The feeling that you're actually growing up.
Sombre
The strong presence that hits you when you realize that University is no longer a dream, but a reality that is just three months away
The overwhelming pain you feel when you think about how there would now be a distance between you and the schoolmates that you hated so much
Or at least, you thought you did
The hit of stupidity you feel when you watch videos of your school days and know that you'd miss them
But how could you miss them
How could you miss all the fights and arguments
All the rumors and gossiping
All the blocking and unfollowing
It's impossible right?
But here you are
Sitting down and remembering all the laughs you had
All the adventures you went on together
Knowing that they would be nothing but memories in a short time to come.
Sombre
The end of a relationship
The end of something you enjoyed so much
The end of all the escapades you went on together
The end of all the fights you fought together
The end of the confidence that you built together
The end of the thoughts, gifts and secrets you shared together
The end of the bond you had
The end of the way that you looked at each other
The end of the heart palpitations you felt whenever you even as little as heard their name
The knowledge that even with all the great parts, it brought the end of the not-so-great parts
It brought the end of the arguments
The end of the feeling of jealousy whenever they spoke to anyone else
The end of the doubts and second thoughts of if you were actually meant to be
The end of the cringe in your guts and the saltiness on the back of your tongue any time you imagined how it would end
And it brought also, the feeling of both relief and sadness when it all did end
But never the way you imagined
Leaving all you had as your bittersweet past.
Sombre
The glass-shattering screams when you receive a call that a loved one has died
The numbness and complete dissociation that you experience for days while trying to actually come to terms with it
The anger at everything
At death for taking them
At the world for letting them go
At earth for not rejecting their body and returning them alive and healthy
The anger at them for leaving you
The feeling of doubt and disbelief
The thoughts of "but they can't be gone"
That grandma who you shared words of wisdom with just last night can't have departed
That mom who you had a hearty dinner with just two weeks ago can't be late
That brother who you just went to a Laker's match with last weekend can't have flatlined
That baby who you'd just given a kiss on the cheek an hour ago can't have suffocated
That none of this happened
That it was all just a nightmare
A nightmare that was oddly long
A nightmare that's confirmed to be reality the moment the first few grams of soil topple onto their coffin
The hit of pain as fate forces you to let go of someone that a part of you thought would be around forever
As you commit them to memory as not a loved one, but as a cherished one.
Sombre
The sound of the car crashing
The light of the sparks as they turn into flames, then a raging fire
The beep-beep-beeeeeep of the heart monitor as your heart reaches a stop
The going in and out of consciousness as you realize that this is it
As you acknowledge the pain that your death would bring about
As you experience what you can never explain to anyone
As your brain plays the seven minutes of your best memories
As you think about all the things you could have done if you didn't care so much what others thought
As you think of all the apologies you never received and all the sorrys you never got to say
The complete powerlessness you feel as you finally submit your soul to the forces of the universe.
© All Rights Reserved
