THESE THOUGHTS, AGAIN
BY C WYNTER

I know I'm not alright, in an air of suspension,
Not really living I guess, just still in depression,
I get quite annoyed, life's not going so well,
Install a mask of indifference, so I have no tell,
Sometimes I like the silence, not much to say,
Sounding like a broken record, when sadness have it's way,
I don't mean to be a downer, I don't like being like this,
Things weigh heavily on my heart, I forget, but struggle to forgive,
Myself, yeah, there I said it, I am so disappointed with me,
I had dreams, plans, but life decided it was not meant to be,
I find I have no hopes for the future lost to a numbed mind,
Trying to keep my shit together, but it's all in the eyes,
I don't know what to do with the fatigue, it just won't let me go,
Keep trying to find reasons to stay, but I don't really know,
All I have is poetry, that most don't understand, except that it's dark,
Hoping I find release with these emotions, bonus if I touch someone's heart,
Cause Lord knows this ain't easy, when it tells you, you've failed,
When the temporary ache becomes permanent, and so you fade,
So who do you talk to? when depression becomes loud again?,
I don't want to bother anyone, so I guess I will take up my pen,
Struggling day by day, I write so I don't complete depressions need,
For though there are no answers, with poetry, it's okay to bleed.

© C.Wynter