9 views
The Emotional Soul.
He would ask her for a chat every now and then. He always wanted to talk when it suited him. Sadly, his awareness of her internal needs, were never really on track. Not really as connective in the way she would pray for them to be.
I guess people don’t always connect in the ways that we want them to, when we are with them. Hence, the misunderstandings and the lack of communication that comes with it, so very much hand in hand.
Just like a hand to a glove, or a sock to a foot.
Jimmy, would always exude his weakness around Justine, his insecurities riding high, his best expression of himself, but an emotionally unattractive one, at that.
He would always verbally put himself down, then ask her why she was with him? This would constantly annoy Justine, hence turning her happy mood into a sad one. She would then have to spend many hours of the days telling him all of his good points, with a side explaination of why she was actually with him. After a while, through the years of continued reassurances from caring and thoughtful mind, that would continually make Jimmy feel uplifted, to lessen his emotional insecurities, about himself. Never dealing with his problematic emotional crutch, as in the end, eventually the spell of romance would wear off bit by bit, for Justine.
As she was left with a feeling in intensity with his feelings of her. This accompanied with his large dose of over stated paranoia, was not at all healthy for anyone, in any relationship. The relationship itself, had definitely taken it’s toll over the years, before Charlie was born and after to. It was strange to think that Jimmy would one day say his mutual “Goodbye” after an on and off relationship for twenty years, that had filled up both of their lives, for such a long time.
Justine sat quietly recalling, that very first day when they met. To think that it was a card of chance, that brought them together in the beginning. She was reading her book, then suddenly looking up, she saw Jimmy standing there.
His puppy dog eyes sending out an sos signal to her, was too hard for her to resist at that minute in time.
How things change, Justine suddenly thought. Everything feels like, all
of this was just yesterday and of course in the realms of time, it literally was.
Except in her heart, it felt much more recent. It was just like a door to her mind of the past opening up again and engaging with the scenes of those yesterdays for a short while.
If she was really honest with herself, she had often walked through that door and visited Jimmy in that pub on that day, many times before. Spending the rest of her days, with him in her mind’s eye, during those sometimes misplaced moments that her would always feel a strong sense of connection too.
We are all emotional souls in one way or another, forever needing others, holding onto something to then only misplace ourselves within those distant moments of intensity, that come hand in hand with all the passions and all the romantic desires that we keep locked inside of us. For we are all, just reaching out and quietly waiting for our twined soul to connect, at some point with us in time.
(10/07/23)
© Josephine Daniels.
I guess people don’t always connect in the ways that we want them to, when we are with them. Hence, the misunderstandings and the lack of communication that comes with it, so very much hand in hand.
Just like a hand to a glove, or a sock to a foot.
Jimmy, would always exude his weakness around Justine, his insecurities riding high, his best expression of himself, but an emotionally unattractive one, at that.
He would always verbally put himself down, then ask her why she was with him? This would constantly annoy Justine, hence turning her happy mood into a sad one. She would then have to spend many hours of the days telling him all of his good points, with a side explaination of why she was actually with him. After a while, through the years of continued reassurances from caring and thoughtful mind, that would continually make Jimmy feel uplifted, to lessen his emotional insecurities, about himself. Never dealing with his problematic emotional crutch, as in the end, eventually the spell of romance would wear off bit by bit, for Justine.
As she was left with a feeling in intensity with his feelings of her. This accompanied with his large dose of over stated paranoia, was not at all healthy for anyone, in any relationship. The relationship itself, had definitely taken it’s toll over the years, before Charlie was born and after to. It was strange to think that Jimmy would one day say his mutual “Goodbye” after an on and off relationship for twenty years, that had filled up both of their lives, for such a long time.
Justine sat quietly recalling, that very first day when they met. To think that it was a card of chance, that brought them together in the beginning. She was reading her book, then suddenly looking up, she saw Jimmy standing there.
His puppy dog eyes sending out an sos signal to her, was too hard for her to resist at that minute in time.
How things change, Justine suddenly thought. Everything feels like, all
of this was just yesterday and of course in the realms of time, it literally was.
Except in her heart, it felt much more recent. It was just like a door to her mind of the past opening up again and engaging with the scenes of those yesterdays for a short while.
If she was really honest with herself, she had often walked through that door and visited Jimmy in that pub on that day, many times before. Spending the rest of her days, with him in her mind’s eye, during those sometimes misplaced moments that her would always feel a strong sense of connection too.
We are all emotional souls in one way or another, forever needing others, holding onto something to then only misplace ourselves within those distant moments of intensity, that come hand in hand with all the passions and all the romantic desires that we keep locked inside of us. For we are all, just reaching out and quietly waiting for our twined soul to connect, at some point with us in time.
(10/07/23)
© Josephine Daniels.
