To kill the dead,
Whose eyes appear to be open.
To put all fears to bed,
To let rest all words I've said.
I want to be someone I can love,
I want destroy the internalised self hatred,
I gave myself.
Everything worth living is mortal and ending,
Every penny earnt needs spending.
My body is binding,
Like it or not,
Which I do not,
No let it rot.
I cannot be a peacock, nor a crow or phoenix,
I can't become what I love,
I am cursed with being neither below nor above.
I heard you,
Now I hear no more.
I saw you,
Now I don't see at all.
But I can feel you,
So I know you're true.
Love only comes in shades of blue,
Feathers fall from birds that flew.
You will remain,
Someone I wish I knew.
These words have been said,
This blood been bled,
Ever crimson velvet red.
I feel so alone,
Yet have no cause to moan.


© Kenny Phoenix
photo by me, all original