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The Proposal
People fall in love several times but only few are able to live an entire life with their loved ones. I too have fallen in love but perceiving the less fortune I have in a love life, I decided not to fall for anyone but to enjoy whatever comes in my way (except falling into a relationship) and may be that is the reason why I started enjoying the beauty of the owner of those bewitching eyes and sparkling smile. Somehow things ended up differently, from being a mere crush to the one I wanted to live a whole life with, the feelings for him have grown within me. The craziest thing is, I who cried a night full, calling my best friend saying "I don't want to love him, I don't want to fall in a relationship", have gathered enough courage within days, to call him and confess my feelings. Sounds paradoxical right?
Yes. Today was the day. It's nearly a month of evacuation, quarantine and isolation. We share a good and healthy relation. We used to talk about many things...family, friends, love life and so many little things that would make both of us laugh. But we never had a discussion about my feelings for him. Apart from all, these corona days, extended vacation and not getting a chance to speak out anything directly -all these had made everything more difficult. But today, I knew that I had to ask him something about this. I never wanted to force him or myself into something we are not ready for, nevertheless I had to know that If we are gonna stand a chance in the future atleast. It's not like I wanted a relationship right now. All I wanted is, to know how he feels about me, so that I can wait with hope and trust until we both are ready.
In the evening around 5, I called him but the line was busy. After 20 mins I got a call back from him. The moment he started talking I knew that I can't ask him anything about what I had in mind because he sounded so happy and I don't want to spoil that. I still don't know how I managed to ask him for a chance. For the next few minutes we talked about us only and as I expected he was unable to give me an answer. Offcourse we can't expect an answer within minutes for one of the most important and hardest questions one may face in his life. He hung up the phone saying "I didn't think about this till now, the ball is in my court and now I have to think". From the silence that lasted for moments before disconnecting the call, I understood that I freaked him out a little bit.
(will continue...)
© athmasakhi
Yes. Today was the day. It's nearly a month of evacuation, quarantine and isolation. We share a good and healthy relation. We used to talk about many things...family, friends, love life and so many little things that would make both of us laugh. But we never had a discussion about my feelings for him. Apart from all, these corona days, extended vacation and not getting a chance to speak out anything directly -all these had made everything more difficult. But today, I knew that I had to ask him something about this. I never wanted to force him or myself into something we are not ready for, nevertheless I had to know that If we are gonna stand a chance in the future atleast. It's not like I wanted a relationship right now. All I wanted is, to know how he feels about me, so that I can wait with hope and trust until we both are ready.
In the evening around 5, I called him but the line was busy. After 20 mins I got a call back from him. The moment he started talking I knew that I can't ask him anything about what I had in mind because he sounded so happy and I don't want to spoil that. I still don't know how I managed to ask him for a chance. For the next few minutes we talked about us only and as I expected he was unable to give me an answer. Offcourse we can't expect an answer within minutes for one of the most important and hardest questions one may face in his life. He hung up the phone saying "I didn't think about this till now, the ball is in my court and now I have to think". From the silence that lasted for moments before disconnecting the call, I understood that I freaked him out a little bit.
(will continue...)
© athmasakhi
