'Maybe it wasn’t worth it, bro.' I sighed, exhaling the white smoke of the half-burnt cigarette.
'Yeah man, I know it sucks at times', Sid exclaimed on the other end of the line. 'But this was your decision, buddy. You wanted to become a doc.'
I took another puff and checked my watch. I was still on duty and I had sneaked out for a cig asking the junior intern to attend the patient who had just been wheeled in a while ago.
'At eighteen we all think we will change the world, Sid.' I was half expecting the intern to call me anytime now.
Sid laughed. 'I’d told you a thousand times back then to go for IIT. You had even qualified for it. I hadn't! I had to settle for a NIT. But you opted for Medicine after qualifying for medical and that was by choice. I repeat "your choice". And you were enjoying it in your initial years. That's what you wanted to do. I know times are worse. People are so impulsive, arrogant; they don't even think twice before suing anybody. They raise fingers, throw stones. But this is just a few handfuls. Don't let a single incident ruin your week, man.'
'It is not about one incident. These are frequent now. Imbeciles with absolutely no idea about medicine think that they know it all after reading something abstract from the internet. You save their kin a hundred times, they will thank God. You fail once and they will curse you because somehow that's your fault. A man aged 82 cannot die naturally, he is immortal! We are the ones who kill for fun.'
'Calm down, bro.'
'...because', I cut him short, 'they think we just get up in the morning and wonder "Oh, this is such a fine day, let's go put some people to the grave." Bloody rascals! Why don’t they vandalize temples and mosques when their prayers aren’t answered? Accountability shall go both ways, isn’t it?'
'What actually happened? I mean did the patient have a condition?' Sid asked.
'He had a fucking CHB. A type 3 heart block. He expired before we could take him to the cardio ER for a cardio-version.'
'Okay now that is Greek to me.'
I continued to fume as if I hadn't heard him. 'Their claim was that his condition only deteriorated after they got him to the hospital and they vandalized the place shouting we should've at least given him a "saline". Can you believe that? They fucking think he died because we didn't put a fluid bottle I.V. How ridiculous! Fluids to an impending cardiac failure patient! Morons!'
'I understand. Just drop it. Don't think so much about it. That was a week ago. Don’t let it bother you so much.'
'Yeah, says the man who works from a desk inside an air-conditioned office in MIT! Funny.' I rubbed my boot on the ground over the cigarette butt.
‘Come over here, practice here. Trust me it’s far better. At least the working environment is.’
‘Yup, like that’s so easy.’ I smirked.
'You could have been in my place as well, Arpan. Besides, why are you in the hospital today? Who works on Sundays?'
I was going to hurl a fresh set of abuses at him when almost instantaneously he corrected himself. 'Oops! sorry, bro, really sorry. Don't speak another word. No! Stop right there. I forgot you are an Emergency doctor now. Sorry. No offense.'
I couldn't help but grin.
'You should take a break and just chill for a few days,' he continued. 'Go to a beach. Maldives. Mauritius. Miami. Somewhere. Just go.'
'I don't get a six figure salary like you do,...