I left my parents' house six weeks ago and I left with the clothes on my back and a tote box of clothes and nothing else. I didn't even have a pair of shoes that didn't have holes in them. I remember the feeling of the concrete underneath my bare feet as I walked out to my sister's car. It was rough and cold but I was scared so I was hot and I really didn't care. I remember my heart being in my throat as my siblings stood around me and told me I needed to leave or else I might be dead because I looked like I had lost a lot of weight and they could see the tubing from my shunt sticking out. I really didn't notice that until my sister asked me what it was that was sticking out of my neck and chest while I was naked in the bathtub waiting for the water to finish filling it. I was flat on my back and my head was resting on the back of the tub and she came in the bathroom to make sure I was OK and she looked over at me and said,
"Hey Brit, what is that sticking out of your neck?" I looked down at my chest and pointed at the end of the tube and then it dawned on me that I was truly that skinny and I was scared and I started to cry. My sister asked me why I was crying and I said I didn't even think of it being that bad because I felt fine other than being hungry and tired constantly and my feet being swollen. I ended up being in the hospital roughly three weeks later because I scared my sister bcause I woke up with a panic attack and I was screaming in my sleep. I only tell this part of my story because I need to put it behind me so I can move on with my life and heal, not so people can feel sorry for me. I'm in a slightly better situation now and I'm learning how to live my own life.
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