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ALONE AND INVISIBLE
Standing in a crowded room where you know everyone. There you sit in the corner all alone. Your not hiding from anyone. In fact, you have tried to talk to each and everyone but not anyone would stay awhile just to fill the wind in your sail.
So in the corner of the room you'll stay until everyone is done... as they all say good bye... you will give them your smile and listen to them lie. Over and over again they will tell you that they missed the opportunity to talk to you and how much they wished they could stay and chat.
What I will never understand standing next to the person that you are with and being completely invisible. Laying next to the person you love and feeling all alone and missing them. Laying so close but everything feels so far away. Touching them and praying that they notice you right next to you and they reach out and touch you back. Wishing that he would look at you like he did in the beginning when he thought of you as a new shiney penny.
Loneliness inside of relationships, I'm talking every kind of relationship is one of the hardest feelings to understand. If you bring up your feelings you are told you are starting a fight, crazy, don't you get enough, you don't need it constantly every day and night. They never see your tears fall, hear your heart breaking, or realize that your fighting to save your own life and you need them to grab your hand and give you a reason to fight just a little harder so you don't climb the stairs to take that final fall.
There is nothing that causes a person to feel more empty inside than Loneliness when you lay next to the one you love and know how many times you have begged and pleaded with them to please just look at, hold you, wipe away a tear, and tell you that everything is going to be ok and instead you get their back and scolded because all you want is what you had when you first started your relationship... you want their love and tender touch. The kiss on the forehead or on your neck, the desire to touch you and excitement that you are within their reach and them to tell you they promise to never give up on you be they know you will never give up on them.
It feels like a stolen love and now you are just the beast that will be starved to death until you are put to rest either from your lonely broken heart or you can no longer fight those voices in your head and you give into your grief and your predesigned, unforgiven, unsung, and sadistically drilled into your head.... those words that you always heard, "you’ll never be goid enough". You are so much more than enough. You are the so more than enough. You deserve to shine as bright as the brightest star.
© Rhonda Broker
So in the corner of the room you'll stay until everyone is done... as they all say good bye... you will give them your smile and listen to them lie. Over and over again they will tell you that they missed the opportunity to talk to you and how much they wished they could stay and chat.
What I will never understand standing next to the person that you are with and being completely invisible. Laying next to the person you love and feeling all alone and missing them. Laying so close but everything feels so far away. Touching them and praying that they notice you right next to you and they reach out and touch you back. Wishing that he would look at you like he did in the beginning when he thought of you as a new shiney penny.
Loneliness inside of relationships, I'm talking every kind of relationship is one of the hardest feelings to understand. If you bring up your feelings you are told you are starting a fight, crazy, don't you get enough, you don't need it constantly every day and night. They never see your tears fall, hear your heart breaking, or realize that your fighting to save your own life and you need them to grab your hand and give you a reason to fight just a little harder so you don't climb the stairs to take that final fall.
There is nothing that causes a person to feel more empty inside than Loneliness when you lay next to the one you love and know how many times you have begged and pleaded with them to please just look at, hold you, wipe away a tear, and tell you that everything is going to be ok and instead you get their back and scolded because all you want is what you had when you first started your relationship... you want their love and tender touch. The kiss on the forehead or on your neck, the desire to touch you and excitement that you are within their reach and them to tell you they promise to never give up on you be they know you will never give up on them.
It feels like a stolen love and now you are just the beast that will be starved to death until you are put to rest either from your lonely broken heart or you can no longer fight those voices in your head and you give into your grief and your predesigned, unforgiven, unsung, and sadistically drilled into your head.... those words that you always heard, "you’ll never be goid enough". You are so much more than enough. You are the so more than enough. You deserve to shine as bright as the brightest star.
© Rhonda Broker
