I'm sorry my mom
For all that I do
I don't know how much you know
But what you knows bad enough

It's not close to the worst
There's stuff I can't imagine
What you would do if you found out
Which is hopefully never

I know you want some grandkids
And for me to live happy
For me to see more success
And not screw it up

You think I'm doing well
Since you know I quit smoking
I hope you don't lose me
I'm not very careful

I will keep working hard
I will keep getting money
I hope my visions are wrong
And that you never find me

I can imagine you and dad
And your oldest all standing
At my wake near my casket
I picture it so vividly

Yet I still do these things
So reckless and damaging
The only regret I do feel
Is when I imagine you guys without me

I've said and done things
I wish I could take back
It makes me feel sick
The amount of love you show me after
© speed