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To the person I love right now.
Can we start all over again?
I want something genuine to hold onto.
Not just alone, but with you.
If we do start over again,
Can we go back to where we have to talk about the issues?
The traumas, your fear, your pain, and your healing?
Will you let me listen?
I want to understand how to take care of you.
It maybe a big thing to ask, it actually is.
However, I can't stop thinking about it.
Will you give me a chance?
Will you give it a try?
Despite of what you think of me right now,
How you see me because of where we left it,
Can we at least give it a try?
Does this still sound like I am begging?
You told me, I am only doing this because I like you and not because I want to be your friend.
But why can't you see that I want to be your friend, and to be something more?
Is it because you have someone else?
If you have someone, will you please just tell me?
I think, it will be easier for me to accept why you can't let me in.
The fact that knowing someone else is there for you,
Then it shows I really am not worth your time.
But it is a direct reason, and the fastest way to just let go.
I keep writing like this, knowing it will never reach you.
I want to keep going, but you were never there with me.
I can't force you. I know that.
This is all just my what ifs being written for me, to remind myself that you aren't coming back.
That you are drifting away from what we have started, from what I thought we had, and it's okay.
You're doing things, that makes you happy.
I just wish I was part of it, and that I was different with the other girls that you've met.

So, to the person I love right now...

I will finally stop, and let you go.


© cece