I WAS IN A LONECITY OF WOLVES WHO WEARS LIKE A SHEEP, LIVING IN THE SICKEST MINDS WHILE THEY PLAY BETWEEN BLACK AND WHITE CHESS BOARDS AS IF WHO WINS AGAINST FOR THE LOVE OF GAMBLING, I HAVE ANGERED WITH FULL OF RAGE WHERE THE FIRE MEETS GASOLINE. THROWING SOME CIGARETTES ON THE FREEZING GROUND FLOOR, WHERE THE FLAME FOLLOWS THE RUMOURS LIKE A WILD FIRE. HOWEVER, THEY DIDN’T CAUGHT ME HOW TERRIBLE THINGS I DID FOR THEM BUT THE DEPTH OF DARKEST MINDS I KEPT IT IN A SILENCE TO THEM FROM MY REAL INTENTIONS, AND YET I REALIZED IN MY HEAD SHRIEKED LIKE A GHOUL OF MY PHANTOM “ YOU WORTHLESS FOOL, YOU CAN NEVER WIN THIS GAMES THEY PLAY WITH THE FIRE YOU CAUSE TO BURN EVERYTHING! ” I BROKE THE GLASS INFRONT OF MY REFLECTION WHERE MY DEAD SIPIRT WAS CURSED IN THAT BROKEN MIRROR I KNEW THE ENEMY SIDE OF ME WAS AGAINST MYSELF.… HAVE I BEEN PUT IN THIS BLACK SPELL IN THIS INVISIBLE WIRES CONNECTED TO MY HEART AND MIND WERE THEY CAN MANIPULATE MY USELESS THOUGHTS AND EMOTIONS?…HAVE I BEEN THAT VICITM WHOSE IMPRISONED IN THE DIMENSION OF MELANCHOLY WITH SELF-DENIAL? I WAS LOST IN THE MIDDLE OF CROWDED PEOPLE, THIS STUBBORN HEART LIKE A STONE LEADS TO THE WRONG PEOPLE WHO ALL CHASE THROUGH AN ENDLESS OF TIME. THE WALLS I BUILT ON MY OWN WHERE FIELDS COULD ONLY WITHERS , AND YET I LET SOMEONE WALKED ACROSS MY WAY BUT TO LET MYSELF OFF GUARD….SO THIS WALLS HAD CRUMBLED…WHEN THIS PERSON HAD ARRIVED AT THE SAME TIME WITH ME..MAY BE A FRIEND OR A FOE, BUT A STRANGER OF MINE WHO WELCOMES ME IN HIS PRESENCE, HE DELIGHTLFULLY INTRODUCED ME TO HIMSELF WITHOUT CONDITIONS, YET A FRIENDLY REMINDER WHO TAUGHT ME HOW TO TRUST…WHEN I LOSE OUT OF CONTROL, AND THE CITY WERE SPINNING AROUND, THEN I REALIZED THERE IS ONE PERSON WHO KNOWS MY HIDDEN INTENTIONS, AND EVEN IN EVERY FLOW OF MY BLOOD HE LIVED IN EVERY PART OF ME THAN ANY OTHER PEOPLE I’M SURROUNDED WITH….SO THE TIME TURNS SLOW AND THE WORLD STOPPED FOR A MOMENT…. HE BREATHE AS I BREATHE THROUGH MY LUNGS, WHEN HIS HEART BEATS AT THE SAME TIME AS MINE AND HE LIVED AS I DO, BY THE TIME I WAS BORN WHEN WE’RE BOTH CHASING AFTER ANOTHER TILL HE GREW UP WITH ME EVEN THOUGH WE HAVEN’T SEEN EACH OTHER FOR A YEARS, BUT STILL WE BECOME PART OF THIS LIFE…. AS IF WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER BEFORE IN THE DIFFERENT WORLDVIEW….A LOVE GROWS WHEN THE RED ROSES SPROUTED GRACEFULLY INTO A TWISTED THORNS OF TRAGIC FATE… IT SHREDED BY A CRUEL SUNSETS DURING THE HARSH SEASON DRASTICALLY CHANGES INSIDE OUT, THE SLITHERING SNAKES OF THESE PEOPLE SCATTERED AROUND ME WHEN A WISE MAN TELLS ME “CAREFUL WITH THIS CREATURES HOW THEY MAKE FRIENDS IN TIME OF NIGHT THIEVES” THEY SLOWLY KILLING THE TRUST AND FAILURE IN PROMISES THEY KEEP….A POISON IVY STINGED IN MY VEINS AS IF THIS STRANGE EMOTIONS DISRUPT THIS COMPLEX MIND, WHILE THIS BLURRED FACE SLOWLY FADING PAINTED BY A JOYFUL EXPRESSIONS HAD TURNED INTO A HOLLOWED FRAILING MASK…I KEPT THIS WORDS WITH MYSELF TILL I VOMIITED OUT OF THIS BLOOD TO SPILL OUT THE TRUTH AS IF YOU FEEL THIS BLEEDING HEART REMINDS ME OF AN EMOTIONAL ABUSIVE, YOU HAVE LEFT ME IN THE DESERT WHERE MY BODY HAS TREMBLED AS I WEAKLY WALKED TO STUMBLE UPON THE STONE, TILL I NO LONGER STAND UP FOR MYSELF… “ I WILL GO AND NEVER SEARCH FOR MY EXISTENCE .....” AND SO QUICKLY THIS TEARS HAVE DRIED TILL IT HAD BURNED WHILE BLINDED BY THE SUNLIGHT, SHE WILL NEVER SEE THE SUN COMES AS SHE HAVE BEEN LIVING IN THE DARKNESS OF DAWN FOR LIFE… A TOWER OVER ME WHERE IMPRISONED WITH CHAINS THROUGH MY FRAGILED HANDS AND FEET. IN THE HIGHEST WALLS AS WE HAVE BEEN DIVIDED IN TWO WORLDS AGAINST US BETWEEN YOU AND ME, AS I SEE IF SOMEONE ENTERS IN THE HEAVEN FORBIDS THE PLACE FROM WHERE I STAYED…. I TOLD HER A FRIENDLY REMINDER IN ORDER NOT TO WALK INTO THE SAME PATH AS I DO “LITTLE GIRL… SINCE YOU’RE VERY YOUNG, YOUR TIME IS PRECIOUS TO LIVE SO DO NOT WASTE TIME JUST TO END UP LIKE MINE” FOR I HAVE LOST THIS SOUL HAS BEEN RENT WELCOMES ME IN THE HOUSE OF CEMETERY… SINCE I’VE WAITED FOR A YEARS WERE BURIED ALL MY DEEPEST DARK SECRETS INTO THE GRAVE…
HE CALLS UPON ME THROUGHOUT THE EMPTY SPACE AND LEFT IN THE DUSTY ROOM“ IS ANYONE OUT THERE?.. HEAR ME OUT IF YOU’RE CALLING!” IN THIS PRISON GATES CANNOT OPEN UP WHERE HIS KNEES AND HANDS CRAWLING WHILE HE REACH OUT FOR SOMEONE WHO COULD SAVE HIS DAMNED LIFE, LIKE THIS IRON BARS HE CAN’T HOLD ON FOR HIS HEAVY DIRTY SOUL…
WHILE HE BARELY HAD FORGOTTEN HIMSELF UNTIL FELL IN THE DEEP HOLE TRAPPED HIM IN THE AMIDST OF HELL WITHIN 50 YEARS OF SORROW LEFT WITH AN IGNORANCE BECOMES A BLISS, IN EVERY STEP WE TAKE HAVE MADE US WALKED TO THE PATH OF MISFORTUNES. THEREFORE,THIS FATE IS WHERE WE ARE HEADING TO THE UNKNOWN, WERE THIS HUNDRED THOUSAND WORDS CANNOT QUITE EXPLAIN BUT THERES GOES IN A DOWNFALL AND FARE THEE WELL AS WE CANNOT REACH OUT FOR THIS DYING TRUST.. ..
TO FORGET THE URGENCY THE MORE HURRIER AND WAIT FOR ANOTHER, AND NO LONGER COMES AROUND, RUNNING OUT OF AN HOUR GLASS OF HOPE, AS THE DEATH TOLD ME “ DON’T BE AFRAID AS I HEAR YOUR HEART STILLL BEATING INCALCULABLE…SO WHEN THE TIME COMES TO KILL YOUR TORMENTED SOULS, YOU ONLY WISHED TO LIVE FOREVER BUT NOW YOU CALL OUT IN THE NAME OF DEATH WHO ONLY WANTS TO DIE EVENTUALLY....
I WHISPERED IN MY HEAD THAT ONLY CONVERSATIONS BETWEEN ME AND DEATH “I LET THE MEMORIES SHATTERED FOR YEARS HAVE BEEN FORGOTTEN BETWEEN THE LOVE AND HATRED IN EVERY SECOND WHILE I HAVE LOST MY SANITY IN THIS MOMENT OF REALIZATIONS….AS I WILL LEAVE ALL THE REST AND NEVER RESENT THE MEMORIES I HAVE LEFT BEHIND EVERYTHING FOR REASON TO BE MISSED, WHEN I’M FEELING EMPTY IN ORDER TO KEEP THIS ADDICTION OF PAIN IN MY MIND,TO MAKE SURE IF I STILL FEEL ANYTHING…”
DEATH TOLD ME “MY CHILD, YOU’RE TOO INNOCENT AND NAÏVE IN THIS REALITY OF WICKEDNESS YOU WILL NOT SUFFER ANYMORE IN THIS EDGE OF DARKENESS.. AS GOOD PEOPLE DIE YOUNG WHILE THIS WRETCHED PEOPLE WILL SUFFER WITHOUT END…YOU ARE THE PUNISHMENT ITSELF THAT WASTED YOUR LIFE TO THEIR EVIL SCHEMES..” THE SPELL CAN EVEN LIES BEHIND THE MIND,BUT THE SHARPNESS OF THIS BLADE WHERE IT FOLLOWS RIGHT STRAIGHT TO THIS CHEST PAIN…. NO NEED TO TAKE THIS ENVY SINCE I WAS BORN FROM IT, EVEN IF THE PAIN CANNOT DISTINGUISHED TAKE A GUESS OF HOW MANY KNIVES I HAVE WITH A THOUDAND CUTS, JUST TRY TO KEEP UP WITH ME…TO THIS HIDDEN BLADE ALL LIFE WAS EQUAL AS THE REAPER SHOWED ME HIS OWN SCYTHE..
AS SOMEONE I THOUGHT THIS LIFE IS WORTH IN SAVING MYSELF, I DON’T EVEN CARE IF SOMEONE COMES AROUND BUT THEY JUST GO LIKE A RUNNING RIVER OF BLOOD AFTER THE DAGGERS BEHIND MY BACK SPILLED OUT OF MY GUTS, SO DOES THIS SCARS NEVER HEALS I HAVE SLICED IN MY BODY TILL IT BLEEDS TO DEATH…I ALWAYS TELL MYSELF THIS WAS A JOB WHICH SLOWLY KILLS OURSELVES AS THE PRICE OF MAKING PEOPLE’S HAPPINESS, NO ALARMS, NO SURPRISES.. BUT KEPT IN THEIR OWN WICKED FAVOR … A WHISPERS IN MY MIND VIOLENTLY IN A DISTORTION OF WORDS “ LET ME OUT OF THIS CITY OF FALSE SAINTS WHEREIN IT LEADS TO THE BLIND FAITH….” WHERE I HEAR THE SHADOWS SCREAMS AS IF WHO MADE IT THIS FAR.. EVEN THOUGH I’M WEAK TILL THEY BEAT ME DOWN TO SLIPPED AWAY ALL THE THINGS UNSAID…AND MAYBE IF MY HEART STOPS IT WOULDN’T HURT THIS MUCH AS IT COULD….
THE VOICES IN MY HEAD HEARS HIS CRY OF DEVASTATION, WHEREIN I GET BACK TO MY OWN SENSES. WHERE THIS WARNINNG SIGNS HAVE SENT HIM IN MILES AWAY DURING DAYS OF MORBIDITY “I WILL FOLLOW YOU, HOLD ON I WILL COME BACK SOON…” SO DON’T LET ME BE A GONER THAT LEFT MY DEAD BODY FROM THE LOST SOUL WHERE STILL ROAMING IN THE MIDST OF COLDNESS…WHILE THIS WEAK HEART BEATING SLOWLY WHEN I STILL FEEL THE GHOST OF YOU WAS CLOSE TO ME THROUGH INSIDE OUT… AS SOMEOENE CRIED OUT MY NAME THROUGH THE LOUD ECHOES WHILE HE WAS CHASING THE WORDS HAD REMAINED IN SILENT UNANSWERED FOR A VERY LONG TIME, SINCE THE BEGINNING TILL IT WHISPERS WITHOUT END, I LOOKED BEHIND AS IF SOMEONE FOLLOWS ME IN THE DARK ROOM FILLLED WITH SHADOWS. … “WOULD YOU WALK BEHIND MY DARKNESS AS IF WHO WOULD HAVE BEEN EASED THROUGH SUFFERING LIKE MINE?” IF SO THEN IT WAS YOU WHO WAS THE HOLLOW SHELL THAT I COULD FILL MYSELF IN YOUR CORPSE … HE ONLY HEARS THE VOICE OF DESPAIR BUT HE CANNOT SEE THE REAL IMAGE OF HER…. IS JUST A LITTLE LATE WHEN I TRIED TO STEPPED OUT IN THE LIGHT… AND SO HERE I’AM.. I WAS LOST AND INSECURED… SHE WAS SEEN CRIPPLED AS IT LOOKED LIKE A DRIED CORPSE THAT HAS DECOMPOSED IN THE ROTTEN GROUND WHERE COMING FROM THE MORGUE BEHIND THE SHADOWS KEPT IN THE DARK…HE WAS ABOUT TO GET SOLD AS HE SET HIMSELF IN THE FIRE, WHERE I HANDED HIS HANDS WHILE HE ALMOST SLIPPED AND GRABBED OUR INTERLOCKED HANDS IN A SUDDEN MOTION WHERE MY BLOOD WERE SEEPED INTO AN ACTUAL HUMAN…… .”YOU HAVE FOUND ME”…
AND DO TELL ME WHAT'S LIKE TO BE ALIVE AGAIN….EVEN HOW WEAK ARE MY BONES TO FIGHT BACK WHEREIN MY BLOOD HAD RUSHED INTO MY VEINS AS YOU HEAR THE PULSIVE WEAK HEART…IN A BATTLE BETWEEN ANGELS AND DEMONS IN SILENT WAR. THEREFORE, THE WORLD WAS FALLING APART. THE LONG ROADS OF LONESEOME DEFEAT WAS THE SILENT SONG OF ANTHEM WERE A JOY IN REVERSE TO THIS PRESENCE WE LIVED IN THE WORLD WITH FULL OF OPTICAL ILLUSIONS, AS YOU FINALLY STARTED A RIOT IN THE DAYS WHERE I BURNED THE REIGN OF GREED BY DEMONS, WHILE THEY RAISED THE FLAGS AS WE FOUGHT FOR A LAST BREATH UNTIL IN OUR DYING DAYS……
MILLIONS OF PEOPLE IN A SUICIDAL BECAUSE OF THE PEOPLE’S WRETCHEDNESS HAVE USED THE ANGELS WITH BROKEN WINGS WHERE THEY FELL FROM ABOVE WHO KILLS IITSELF BY THEIR INNOCENCE…