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Gaze of a stranger part1
Chapter one
After my heart was crushed by the wave of realization that hit me suddenly, for I would be a liar to say I did not see the first sign of rain but nevertheless,I did not know that the rain will come with storms that will try to take me out.
Sitting on my wooden bed with a thick mattress made of foam,I suddenly leaned to lay on the mattress, for I needed the warmth of the mattress and my heart was too heavy to sit up,so the support of the soft mattress would go a long way in cushioning it.
Threatening to break to pieces,I knew my heart was important for even me to exist and remain relevant, for who would be willing to loan me a heart? perhaps if I had resources,resources so deficient that has left me open to this derilous monsters in the search of love,yes perhaps,if I had money I could easily find a heart donor.For how many more journeys like this will I go on, before I learn the most important lesson fate had to teach, for the price of love,is the blood of man, innocent blood, for just the warmth of heart.For now in the return of my second journey,I can bodily say, that love is not worth the price.
For to dedicate one's life to care for a pig,means that one too would have to live like a pig,cause in nature,there must be a balance.It was no surprise that after the storms, wet from the rain and shivering in the cold,that when a warm arm came and wrapped me up,and put it's dry coat over me,and I cried my eyes out in his arm that would be the one I survived by and my heart would be familiar to it, for he came in the nick of time and took me back to safety.
As I began to doubt,if safety really meant being safe, for I knew by now the people who heard my story would begin to wonder what a disarrayed mind and what has the storm done to this young woman, for though I was young,yet I was old for I have seen days repeat itself and rainbows shine in double.
Now the most important decision before me,food for I now knew that in starvation there was no heartbreak for even if there is,one was greater and felt the most,then shelter for I did not know a sane heartbroken man living freely in the street with the peevish eyes of the vultures at night and the stern look of the African owl,who wouldn't rethink,if crying over spilt milk is worth the drama.
Was and is, hilarious now I knew why things remained in the past and never made it into the future, because somethings have to occupy being a was, and the is remain until it becomes a was.
Now I could laugh, for all that ended was one miserable person found their way out of my world, while I should be rejoicing instead I held on to good memories a little percent from the majority of bad memories that if not for circumstance and naivety,I would have took to my heels and tell the story as an ordeal.
Laughing out loud, for now my heart had gained life again and I could sit up reminisce old memories,laugh at them and wonder how I got entangled in a drama.The laughter shot blood into my vessels for it was a laughter of accomplishment for now I could be let to love again,at least I thought.For who would chase after a leprous man yet it was something I did, because he had weak eyes and I have fallen in love with him, until his bones were nourished and he opened his eyes wider and hilariously it was not a weak eye.It was the eye of ego,a broken one at that.
© Chika Chim'dinelo
After my heart was crushed by the wave of realization that hit me suddenly, for I would be a liar to say I did not see the first sign of rain but nevertheless,I did not know that the rain will come with storms that will try to take me out.
Sitting on my wooden bed with a thick mattress made of foam,I suddenly leaned to lay on the mattress, for I needed the warmth of the mattress and my heart was too heavy to sit up,so the support of the soft mattress would go a long way in cushioning it.
Threatening to break to pieces,I knew my heart was important for even me to exist and remain relevant, for who would be willing to loan me a heart? perhaps if I had resources,resources so deficient that has left me open to this derilous monsters in the search of love,yes perhaps,if I had money I could easily find a heart donor.For how many more journeys like this will I go on, before I learn the most important lesson fate had to teach, for the price of love,is the blood of man, innocent blood, for just the warmth of heart.For now in the return of my second journey,I can bodily say, that love is not worth the price.
For to dedicate one's life to care for a pig,means that one too would have to live like a pig,cause in nature,there must be a balance.It was no surprise that after the storms, wet from the rain and shivering in the cold,that when a warm arm came and wrapped me up,and put it's dry coat over me,and I cried my eyes out in his arm that would be the one I survived by and my heart would be familiar to it, for he came in the nick of time and took me back to safety.
As I began to doubt,if safety really meant being safe, for I knew by now the people who heard my story would begin to wonder what a disarrayed mind and what has the storm done to this young woman, for though I was young,yet I was old for I have seen days repeat itself and rainbows shine in double.
Now the most important decision before me,food for I now knew that in starvation there was no heartbreak for even if there is,one was greater and felt the most,then shelter for I did not know a sane heartbroken man living freely in the street with the peevish eyes of the vultures at night and the stern look of the African owl,who wouldn't rethink,if crying over spilt milk is worth the drama.
Was and is, hilarious now I knew why things remained in the past and never made it into the future, because somethings have to occupy being a was, and the is remain until it becomes a was.
Now I could laugh, for all that ended was one miserable person found their way out of my world, while I should be rejoicing instead I held on to good memories a little percent from the majority of bad memories that if not for circumstance and naivety,I would have took to my heels and tell the story as an ordeal.
Laughing out loud, for now my heart had gained life again and I could sit up reminisce old memories,laugh at them and wonder how I got entangled in a drama.The laughter shot blood into my vessels for it was a laughter of accomplishment for now I could be let to love again,at least I thought.For who would chase after a leprous man yet it was something I did, because he had weak eyes and I have fallen in love with him, until his bones were nourished and he opened his eyes wider and hilariously it was not a weak eye.It was the eye of ego,a broken one at that.
© Chika Chim'dinelo
