No one (except your dad) knows what I am about to share with you today, and even he, does not remember it. It was precisely at this very hour and minute, two years ago, that I had received the news that you had come to me!!! There was such chaos in my life at that time - utter turmoil. I was on the brink of losing the one who had given life to me, and receiving the news that I would be bringing you to life! What seemed like endless days and nights, there were fights because of what others said and the result was an anxious, in despair, sleepless me, who just couldn't believe that people were ready to leave us alone at that desparate hour of need, despite begging them not to...certain wounds, never heal...we just learn to live with them, and grow with them!

My dear, dear Poppy - know that I love you each day, every day, every waking minute of my life, and I miss you, I MISS YOU! You my child, you had to give your life to make me see how naive I was, how trusting I was, how hopelessly see-good-in-all I was. YOU made me stronger than I could EVER have even imagined myself to be. You proved to me, that everyone comes alone in this world, should learn to survive alone here, and will eventually perish alone as well.

You made me the mother I am to your sister. You taught me to be the sole villager, to be TWO AGAINST THE WORLD, to put up boundaries, to prioritise MYSELF, no matter what is happening around me, for unlike the older version of your mom, no one really gives a ****.

I write to you now, not in despair, not wallowing in sadness, but from a place where there is so much love, and calm, and peace, and strength, and belief (again), and where I have let go of the anger (finally) and continue to heal! Stay safe and happy with both my Naanis, till we meet again my love! You will always be my "good news" and you will ALWAYS be my FIRST CHILD, while your sister will be my FIRST BORN!
© Prachi Shukla - The Untamed