Date: Jul 2, 2009 3:06 AM
Subject: the solid truth

It's almost 3 in the morning. I'm nauseated- I'm tired and I can't sleep. I think about you constantly. Twice I have almost had you and the third time I fucked up. I know it sounds like a broken record but, I'm sorry. I wanted you rabidly without thinking things through. I have always thought (perhaps too hard) that there was a divine cause that walked you back into my life twice since we had been together. I don't know how much it meant to you but, that night on the levee was the most motion picture-esque night I have ever experienced in my life. I mean, it was special to me beyond words. And when you found me last year and you told me that you had dreamt about me and I had most recently dreamt about you well, my mind started racing and my hope began swelling so much that my sense had no room. I would never intentionally hurt you. NEVER! You have never been second- to anyone! I spend most of my days hoping to see you or hear even mindless chit-chat. I'm not much, Kelly. Just a man with faults who knows one simple solid truth: I love you and I miss you intensely. I'm sorry for unloading that on you.

© Michael Paul Reed