I know what is best for me, and i know what would be the easiest. But what if what you want isnt whats best for you? ive never been a fan of change and the thought of losing it all kills me. I fear that i may not ever make a decision on what i want til i just blows out of porportion. the man im married to is good to me and deserves nothing but the best and to be happy. he is everything i ever wanted in a man. he doesnt hit me or cheat on me. he works to take care of us and never complains but some were along the line change hapoened and before i knew it there was someone else and as hard as i try fighting it this other man has my heart. and i love him. letting this just play out could get ugly and i dont want that because i really am in love with two men. and im starting to feel like they both deserve better than me