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I walk through the Valley of Death
THIS IS A TRUE STORY!
It's been awhile since I've written a story, so I want to tell you why it's been so long.
Since my last story, quote or poem, I have walked through the Valley of ☠Death☠️️, I've seen the evil of the pandemic, witnessed death and even with no prior military experience, I've experienced things you wish to never have seen.
I grew up living my life in full, betrayed by family who sought to protect me, just to bring my life down in ruins. A mother who not only single, but lost in time as she puts her only son through hell, contradicting him to tell lies to get him to get help he didn't need. Because a doctor told her he had Bipolar and Schizophrenia with a 5th grade learning disability.
We all grow up differently and experience our own ways of psychiatric loss. We all have been there in one way or another. But my life of lies, pain and heartache only brought my life to ruin when I couldn't serve my country, so I seeked a work around and served a company that thought me a lot, and within the shadows I worked as a covert operations field commander and did contracts to work for the enemy, arm those and train those who were bullied by tyrants and countries who do not agree with politicians or the way they live. But throughout my time, I've done things I can't take back, eliminated (Murdered) my own countryman because of orders of my superiors and the nightmares don't go away, the pain is still within, and although I used to love what I do, after recent events of killing my own countryman and native allies I had to make a call to put a stop to it all. So I had to walk the valley of death, and I know what I need to do, and I'm afraid of the outcome, I know there will be coverups if I try, I know I may never see life or freedom again. But I know that this needs to happen to free my soul and tell the truth even if mankind betrays me.
You know my story, and if you don't you can read it on my profile. I don't hold back, but I recently got cleared from nearly dying from Coronavirus 19. From October-December I was a Covid 19 victim, I am just now getting over a cough that shortly followed after and I took that as a sign from God telling me to come clean.
I've been given too many chances to tell my story.
In America anyone convicted of Domestic Violence isn't allowed to own or Carry a Weapon of any variant. My first convection happened at the age of 21, my second at 31, both times wrongfully convicted, but with my "Illness & Father's history" it was used against me regardless of the proof or hearsay.
After I turned 19, I worked for a Mob that taught me how to survive, trained me in firearms and got me in to some serious work. By 21 I was recruited by a Shadow Company that doesn't have a name just a nickname, they don't belong to a country, they work for various people, countries, agencies, etc, and stating what I'm stating now can get me arrested or killed. But I can't hold back anymore & If they come for me, I won't fight for survival because I can't survive these ghosts anymore, my breakdowns are going to cost me the lives of my men or worse.
From 21-24 I've had a total of 342 confirmed kills with over 600 missions completed. By 29 I've had over 800 confirmed kills on all fronts Allied, Friend, Enemy & Contracts. By 30 I have had over 1000 confirmed kills and my nightmares at this point started to screw with me, I just wanted two things out of life.
1. To serve the US Army and one day become a Special Operations Commander
2. To have a loving family to come home too
But because of my psychiatric hospilization & history of DV, I couldn't join the service. Which meant my whole life preparing to serve was a waste and my whole life learning about Strategy, Tactics & Arsenal Warfare was pointless. If it wasn't for this Shadow Company, I don't know where I'd be.
I'm still learning to speak Arabic, Russian & Chinese, but my translation in Moderate compared to most people.
The reason I'm telling this story is because, I'm hoping that in time my prayers to the Lord can clear my mind, soul & repent for Mercy in the graves of our Lord.
But I never wanted to kill or harm anyone I called Ally, Friend or Family and yet I've done so by carrying out my orders. I've killed so many that I can't live with myself and If you met me, you wouldn't think that I have Weapons Training, Hand to Hand Combat is the one thing I'm weak at, but give me a rifle, a team and a week and I'll complete a mission solo or with that provided team. As long as my ghosts don't get me killed first.
Going to the feds, police or any government agency is pointless because no one would believe me, call me a phony and/or a crazy person.
So I now look for piece in my writings, hoping it's enough to set my Soul free. But that's my story and the moral of my story is, If you have a dark secret that no one knows about, I recommend sharing it, rather people believe it or not, you know the truth and by writing about it, may give you some piece in mind. Then again it may not, but you will never know, until it's released.
Thank You!
© Inspiration & Motivation
It's been awhile since I've written a story, so I want to tell you why it's been so long.
Since my last story, quote or poem, I have walked through the Valley of ☠Death☠️️, I've seen the evil of the pandemic, witnessed death and even with no prior military experience, I've experienced things you wish to never have seen.
I grew up living my life in full, betrayed by family who sought to protect me, just to bring my life down in ruins. A mother who not only single, but lost in time as she puts her only son through hell, contradicting him to tell lies to get him to get help he didn't need. Because a doctor told her he had Bipolar and Schizophrenia with a 5th grade learning disability.
We all grow up differently and experience our own ways of psychiatric loss. We all have been there in one way or another. But my life of lies, pain and heartache only brought my life to ruin when I couldn't serve my country, so I seeked a work around and served a company that thought me a lot, and within the shadows I worked as a covert operations field commander and did contracts to work for the enemy, arm those and train those who were bullied by tyrants and countries who do not agree with politicians or the way they live. But throughout my time, I've done things I can't take back, eliminated (Murdered) my own countryman because of orders of my superiors and the nightmares don't go away, the pain is still within, and although I used to love what I do, after recent events of killing my own countryman and native allies I had to make a call to put a stop to it all. So I had to walk the valley of death, and I know what I need to do, and I'm afraid of the outcome, I know there will be coverups if I try, I know I may never see life or freedom again. But I know that this needs to happen to free my soul and tell the truth even if mankind betrays me.
You know my story, and if you don't you can read it on my profile. I don't hold back, but I recently got cleared from nearly dying from Coronavirus 19. From October-December I was a Covid 19 victim, I am just now getting over a cough that shortly followed after and I took that as a sign from God telling me to come clean.
I've been given too many chances to tell my story.
In America anyone convicted of Domestic Violence isn't allowed to own or Carry a Weapon of any variant. My first convection happened at the age of 21, my second at 31, both times wrongfully convicted, but with my "Illness & Father's history" it was used against me regardless of the proof or hearsay.
After I turned 19, I worked for a Mob that taught me how to survive, trained me in firearms and got me in to some serious work. By 21 I was recruited by a Shadow Company that doesn't have a name just a nickname, they don't belong to a country, they work for various people, countries, agencies, etc, and stating what I'm stating now can get me arrested or killed. But I can't hold back anymore & If they come for me, I won't fight for survival because I can't survive these ghosts anymore, my breakdowns are going to cost me the lives of my men or worse.
From 21-24 I've had a total of 342 confirmed kills with over 600 missions completed. By 29 I've had over 800 confirmed kills on all fronts Allied, Friend, Enemy & Contracts. By 30 I have had over 1000 confirmed kills and my nightmares at this point started to screw with me, I just wanted two things out of life.
1. To serve the US Army and one day become a Special Operations Commander
2. To have a loving family to come home too
But because of my psychiatric hospilization & history of DV, I couldn't join the service. Which meant my whole life preparing to serve was a waste and my whole life learning about Strategy, Tactics & Arsenal Warfare was pointless. If it wasn't for this Shadow Company, I don't know where I'd be.
I'm still learning to speak Arabic, Russian & Chinese, but my translation in Moderate compared to most people.
The reason I'm telling this story is because, I'm hoping that in time my prayers to the Lord can clear my mind, soul & repent for Mercy in the graves of our Lord.
But I never wanted to kill or harm anyone I called Ally, Friend or Family and yet I've done so by carrying out my orders. I've killed so many that I can't live with myself and If you met me, you wouldn't think that I have Weapons Training, Hand to Hand Combat is the one thing I'm weak at, but give me a rifle, a team and a week and I'll complete a mission solo or with that provided team. As long as my ghosts don't get me killed first.
Going to the feds, police or any government agency is pointless because no one would believe me, call me a phony and/or a crazy person.
So I now look for piece in my writings, hoping it's enough to set my Soul free. But that's my story and the moral of my story is, If you have a dark secret that no one knows about, I recommend sharing it, rather people believe it or not, you know the truth and by writing about it, may give you some piece in mind. Then again it may not, but you will never know, until it's released.
Thank You!
© Inspiration & Motivation
