....... or a situationship and I'm not trying to jump back in another one. That morning Troy says I'm sorry and even though I'm a little weirded out about it I tell him that's okay. We still talked at work because like I said he's very cool person. I am a little depressed that me and my cousin don't know much anymore, even though right now she calls me and Troy 💩 talkers. Speaking of Troy he's probably going to move in tonight. He comes over all flustered low key kind of cute though. A week later I talked to my cousin about Troy she actually says even though he's an oddball to give him a shot and she hates the guys I even think about giving a chance to not that I'm thinking about giving the chance to Troy that's kind of weird. Today Troy texted me he has a name for his things how weird who would name all their stuff the same name guess what he named this stuff Brutus. Now Troy is asking me what he does with the rest of his stuff named Brutus. He tell him he can bring a Brutus here I guess. He calls me I'm in the middle of a play and he asked me to come help him with his stuff or should I say Brutus. So of course I'm going to help him but he's got to give me a few minutes. He is apparently outside on a bench by my house okay I got to hurry up because he's out there he's waiting and his crazy ex is looking for him I don't even think I have time to change after this how embarrassing I'm going out there in my play outfit and sandals oh well though. Oh my goodness I don't see him I'm about to text him or call him. Hey what's up where are you? He says I'm on a bench by the old Walmart, oh no I totally started walking the other way I'm going to have to turn around. So I turn around and start walking I still don't see him yet I keep walking, at last I see him oh my gosh so he didn't name his stuff Brutus he has a dog and this dog is adorable! I wonder what kind of dog he is oh my goodness this dog is so cute though a multicolored little dog, I really like this little dog, all I can say is cute cute cute! Plus the little dog is friendly. Once again Troy does something cute as well but I am kind of disgusted with myself for thinking that Troy even did something cute. Well it's kind of late probably going to end up staying up all night again, but then later we can take the adorable little dog on a walk.So I decided to ask Troy if you even wanted to go on a walk with adorable little dog and he said of course I'm not doing anything else. So we walked and we talked and we kind of have the same thinking process and certain things which is cool I think this guy is becoming like one of my best friends. I love his dog I was going to say Low key but Troy even knows I love his dog high key. I have the day off tomorrow so I'm getting to take the puppy on a walk around town I'm so excited! Troy talks with me some more we get to know each other a little bit more and then we go to bed. I'm so tired even though I slept last night but last night was the happiest I've been in a long time. I am so happy with these two moved in actually I've never been this happy in my whole entire life low key maybe I should give Troy a chance. Only thing with giving Troy a chance is I had my heart crushed by guys I didn't even like half as much as him. I think I like Troy so much because he makes me happy and Brutus the adorable little puppy definitely makes me happy too he's such a sweetheart. Well maybe I should wait a while before I give Troy a chance just to be on the safe side. Troy is kind of pushing me to give him a chance I definitely don't want to lose him maybe I should just say yes and give him a chance. After talking with him some more I realized he is the guy I want to be with forever. On another plus side Brutus loves walking and I love taking him for walks and just chilling nothing he's such a cool little dog. Today is the day where I say yes fully to giving Troy a chance then we're going to hang out with my cousin's for a little bit she's probably going to interrogate him though. I decided to go to my cousin's with Brutus even though her daughter is scared of animals Brutus is such a nice little puppy. After a few seconds her daughter falls in love with Brutus. I am actually so happy about that cuz then I can bring him over there pretty much whenever I go over there which will be fun. Later on that night I seriously can't wait for Troy to get off work. He's waiting on my cousin's boyfriend shift to get off break because then before I can come over here only 30 more minutes waiting. Finally, now I get to spend time with Troy like I've been waiting for all day and Brutus. It's then like the most amazing week of my life with these two, I'm so happy like I said before this is the happiest I've ever been.Troy decided to move out back into his ex girlfriends that is.
Now I know what you are thinking you are crazy if you think this is going to work out but Troy you don't know Troy how I do he promises it will work.
He said he's going to do everything to make it work and then some plus he's never gave me any reason not to trust him. However let's start back from the moving night. I was such a wreck asking him why, why are you doing this to me? He says my ex's parents are old and they cannot take care of themselves anymore. I asked him why he did not think of that before he didn't say anything so I felt like there was something off but I let it go for a moment then I brought him upstairs and told him we have to talk. His response was okay when we went upstairs I bursted out crying, asking why I wasn't good enough, I also went as far as asking him if he wanted to get back with her or was still in love with her. He said no but something was off he was cold to touch, he didn't display any real emotions but he was barely hugging me as I was crying then he pulled away, he said look at me we're going to make this work I am in love with you. My emotions are all over somehow the room is spinning. All I can think about is how he told he loves me but I am doubting it not only because he had no emotion when I was crying but because he has been wanting to wanting to hangout with his ex. I also have been so happy with this guy but I am torturing myself. He said he was moving in to basement but what if he lied and what if he lied multiple times in our relationship, then again some times I just think negative. I'm going to be optimistic everyone says leave him but he says he wants to be in a relationship with me. I asked so many questions to him and to myself about it this is going to work and everytime he reassures me that it will I just have to trust him and give him time. I am finally going to give him a choice he is coming by the house tomorrow to get the rest of his stuff. Tomorrow is finally here he seems unsure of something I am going to ask him, he actually has to tell me something he is unsure of who he wants. I am okay about more okay than I thought I would be. A few days go by he tells me he wants me back I am happy! I am clearly super happy! We actually work together all week and of course I am going to let you guys know how that goes. He was nothing but love until Friday came then he was distant and started acting weird again. I still have three more hours of work how am I going to make it through this, this feeling is killing me why is he acting like this. I am going to ask him I ask he says he's sick. He gets sent home early another employee says he saw him with his girlfriend my stomach drops because I am supposed to be his girlfriend, but I manage to convince myself it's not what it looks like that they were walking together to get food for the house or but then I see them walk pass McDonald's holding hands. I feel like I am being cut opened , later that night he decides to send me a text saying I'm sorry I don't know what I want. I decided we had to talk in person I told him he needs to let me know when he figures out who he actually wants because neither one of us wants to be taken for granted. He said he was raised by his grandparents his word still means something then he told me he won't do anything with anyone of us until he figures it out and he would let me know when he did. Months go by, he is leading me on making all these promises but still nothing is for sure I told him I really really need things to be for sure. The next day his relationship status changed but I can't not see I had to find out from a different coworker. I am crushed but mostly because he didn't tell me. All these thoughts are running through my head but the truth is he was a little boy who ran around playing with women's feelings because he doesn't know what he wants in anything. This story is not over because he also made himself out to be the victim and his ex non-exgirlfriend was dumb enough to believe it but I didn't explain anything to her, not even all the bad things he said about her I'm not going to get into detail but I didn't explain anything to her because I didn't need to the same reason please don't explain to flies that honey is sweet and taste way better than this stuff they eat. It really does suck that I lost that friendship more than anything but I mean he was fake so I guess I didn't need him anyways.
For once in my life I don't know what to do, I wish you knew what I'm going through.
I really need somebody to talk to the only two cons would be I don't want to sound weak and the second one would be therapy is expensive.
I assuming no one was thinking about poor people with problems.
Somehow my life decided to take a few spins to see where it would land, but this is not gambling.
This is not a game it would be nice if my life could go back to normal, or at least how it was.
Instead of getting worse sometimes I feel like I am cursed.
My problem is I am helpful to those who would never help me back & I know that, but part of me still feels bad.
My second problem is I get so sad though it comes & it goes away I just want a day where I can stay happy all day.
Now we are moving on to the third problem that is my workplace lately now I wasn't going to tell anyone but I am getting treated unfairly & lately I have been very stressed out from work plus other problems but a lot of it has to do with work & don't get me wrong I usually love my job.
The fourth thing is I am not single again & I'll tell you why this is a bad thing, because he is actually crazy but I love him, I tend to pick "the bad ones the always make me sad ones".
Moving onto the fifth this one is my health conditions, which the stress is making worse, body parts are actually starting to hurt more & more, I really didn't know that stress could do all of this, I am continuing to get more sick.
The sixth one kinda goes along with the fifth one and it is weight gain, I have received a lot of judgement for gaining ten pounds in the past, however back then I was running track.
The seventh one of my this is not going to be fun the seventh one is I got myself a room who not payed anything in rent or bills at all, he says he's going to but I don't know I'm thinking he'll just come up with another excuse instead of just tell the truth.I like to believe that most people are good but most people prove me wrong or maybe I'm just special and it's the ones I attract


He goes by Tony but should have went by phony he is a smooth talker, but he stole my black ottoman I know it was only worth twenty dollars but Tony sir don't you know you shouldn't steal from a pregnant woman at all, he also took or should I say stoled okay so this is going to turn into a long book a broom that was gray and blue worth $13, now let me explain how this all happened while I was napping somewhere to have a vacation from all the stress in the mess Anthony Fuller became a vagrant, basically a rodent and I hope he knows it, he stole a little black pan $20 but you know him stealing it wasn't even supposed to be a plan,he took forks with flowers and spoons that's about $40, he damaged things why did he even have the rage he got to live here 3 months for free, I would you tell me but you probably wouldn't even know so I'll tell you some more things he stole, a nice new orangish pan $70 sounds he really needed the silver handle, he's always walking around expecting a hand out, when he didn't even work for anything he was a jerk for everything he's a got I would imagine on the spot about him being a jerk for everything he's got, like the $20 circle bottle he stole from me oh yeah and the kinda of nice working TV was about 80, let's so much things he stole from me this should be easy to make this a long story no wonder he hurried out and the family acted up to something next time I'll trust my gut feeling, little gray stools with flower designs he must have thought they were cool $14 but still, he also decided to take a newer blow up bed $199 before he fled this is a mean thought but kinda hope he gets a taste of led, petty stuff I'll still write if I can remember like the pens for $5 and the note taker for 8 also a blue duster for 8 an ice cube maker for $5, at this point necklaces were about $50 and his lies also costed me, the he even stoled the scale my aunt gave me, colorful sets of dishwear with hardly any wear and tear costing about 60, two big blue bins that I could have used for my kid costing $95, Anthony who goes by Tony has stole from me hopefully he stays homeless from on and never gets a job is how I feel but he's like a toilet tool and we all use plumbers at one time to shove our poop back under, but what I've learned if you hang around with poop for so long you start to become it and that is exactly what he did, and taught his kids his ex-wife and him seem a lot of like evil and deceitful, I 100% believe in karma and since he stole what feels like a hundred more things for me I'll continue this story on a different page I guess the lesson will be, be extremely careful who you let in your life because as soon as some people get the chance to physically stab you with a knife or a theoretically stab you with a knife they will start slicing.
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