I'm tired of cry. I'm tired of pretending to the whole world I'm okay. I've spent the past year of my life crying. Partly trying to make something work where there was no love, and now having so much love for someone I can't even be with. So much anxiety I know it's irrational to keep putting myself in this position, but my old self always creeps back into my own thoughts. When it's dark. When I'm lonely. I fall apart all over again like I've done so many time. There's nothing that can be done, and nothing is any different than before... so how can my mind still run through endless scenarios?

Love isn't easy. It requires work. It requires long hugs and short bouts of anger. It requires persistence, it isn't for those without patience. It requires truth, no matter how ugly. It demands commitment, dedication isn't enough. It isn't all roses and candy. But it's so much more beautiful than that. Real love, true love overcomes our weakness, our fears, our anxiety. In a 30 second hug, my life changed. Anyone that understands and has allowed themselves to feel loved, knows exactly what mean. My life changed in a 30 second hug...wow! Each kiss we exchange still makes me feel like a strong man and a little boy. Love requires a lot. And I'd do whatever I had to do in order to sustain the feeling of your hugs. Whatever love requires me to do.
to never have to experience:
© vinod sam