I remember it like it was yesterday, I can still see the room we were in. I can smell our mothers febreze, fresh linen, used to be so comforting. until you. You were supposed to protect me growing up. be there for me. show me the ropes. but at an early age, you took advantage of me. you tortured me. you hurt me worse than anyone could ever. I was 3, maybe 4. you were 11 or 12. you knew better.

it was dark, almost bed time. mom and dad were downstairs. leanna was with us. you told us to come here. we came into your room. you told us to climb into the circular toy bins we had. we did. you came to me first.. you told me it was ok and it wouldn't hurt. you put your hand over my mouth and pulled down my pants. you inserted yourself into me. I screamed, started freaking out, and crying. you told me if I cried mom and dad would come and it wouldn't be good for me. you told me if I told anyone that mom and dad would be mad at me.

I believed you. I thought it was ok. I thought nothing of it. until I got older. I made myself think it was a dream or rather a nightmare. I blocked it out for years. when new trauma surfaced this resurfaced and hit me like a train of emotions thoughts ect.. what do I do? tell everyone or keep it a secret. I've kept it for 19-20 years, and I'm not taking it to the grave.

you broke me before I could have the chance to be broken by choice.. and for that I'll never forgive you my brother.. for that you will rot in hell..


© heathermarie23