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One World One Person
I had cause to stop and think today about people in general.
It was precipitated by a chance meeting of a friend not seen since before the pandemic ushered us all into involuntary seclusion as if influenced by the lives of Howard Hughes, or George Harrison.
Oddly enough, her being a lady, we met in a builders merchants, me looking for metal screws and strong adhesive and her I'm not sure.
Because we were both wearing masks we noticed each other but unlike my realisation, she did not recognise me.
I walked passed her as she stood to wait at the paint counter and gently bode her 'Hi'. Momentarily nonplussed she realised who I was and countered with,'I didn't recognise you with the mask!'
We slipped easily into the ritual perfunctories of conversation and briefly detailed our versions of the last three months under 'lockdown' and it's undoubted ramifications.
We exchanged updates of our personal circumstances during which time she had told me about certain financial dealings and life-changing events. At which point she asked me if I knew of her and her partner's breakup, also a good friend of mine. I said yes I had spoken to him by mobile a couple of weeks prior.
It then became clearer about her financial dealings and obvious life-changing events.
Breaking up is never an easy situation to live through or face. There are no winners, not financially, and certainly not emotionally.
When young it can be devastating but when, as is this lady, in her sixties it must feel as if Armageddon has unveiled its plan at your very door.
As we spoke and with reference to the levels of lawlessness being faced in South Africa today she muted her fear of staying alone in her home with unresolved crimes occurring within half a kilometre of where she lives.
Not being South African, and during the breakup, she had committed herself financially. Although I believe having some income from her own country, she felt that it would not suffice to sustain her into old age in her homeland. This could and would for the foreseeable future see her resident in SA.
What got me to thinking is throughout our lives we traverse times, situations and changes.
We are born into families who nurture and protect us. We, through force of civil demands, progress through education into work that as often as not impacts our lives whereby by default we distance ourselves from our loved ones.
Marriage, children needs, housing requirements, further impact our family links. We find ourselves in another family, another dynamic and one which our roles now mirror that of our parents. But now the decisions are ours. Should a breakup occur than all are negatively tarnished?
Work is another area closely linked to how the world imposes itself upon your psyche.
In all of these situations outside of your first home life, you find yourself forever adjusting, evaluating, your circumstances, your role, the demands, the sacrifices, the desires, your expectations and needs.
So when that fatal day when you both decide to part becomes a reality then all the ramifications start to coalesce and make themselves manifest as time goes by.
To go through this in your thirties and forties is horrendous, but at some future point as your circumstances change a flicker of hope and a rekindling of self belief gives you the strength to pick up the pieces and flash that smile once again to a waiting world.
For the friend, I met in the builders merchants buying I know not what, she may be unable to pick up the pieces and flash that smile to a patiently waiting world!
It was precipitated by a chance meeting of a friend not seen since before the pandemic ushered us all into involuntary seclusion as if influenced by the lives of Howard Hughes, or George Harrison.
Oddly enough, her being a lady, we met in a builders merchants, me looking for metal screws and strong adhesive and her I'm not sure.
Because we were both wearing masks we noticed each other but unlike my realisation, she did not recognise me.
I walked passed her as she stood to wait at the paint counter and gently bode her 'Hi'. Momentarily nonplussed she realised who I was and countered with,'I didn't recognise you with the mask!'
We slipped easily into the ritual perfunctories of conversation and briefly detailed our versions of the last three months under 'lockdown' and it's undoubted ramifications.
We exchanged updates of our personal circumstances during which time she had told me about certain financial dealings and life-changing events. At which point she asked me if I knew of her and her partner's breakup, also a good friend of mine. I said yes I had spoken to him by mobile a couple of weeks prior.
It then became clearer about her financial dealings and obvious life-changing events.
Breaking up is never an easy situation to live through or face. There are no winners, not financially, and certainly not emotionally.
When young it can be devastating but when, as is this lady, in her sixties it must feel as if Armageddon has unveiled its plan at your very door.
As we spoke and with reference to the levels of lawlessness being faced in South Africa today she muted her fear of staying alone in her home with unresolved crimes occurring within half a kilometre of where she lives.
Not being South African, and during the breakup, she had committed herself financially. Although I believe having some income from her own country, she felt that it would not suffice to sustain her into old age in her homeland. This could and would for the foreseeable future see her resident in SA.
What got me to thinking is throughout our lives we traverse times, situations and changes.
We are born into families who nurture and protect us. We, through force of civil demands, progress through education into work that as often as not impacts our lives whereby by default we distance ourselves from our loved ones.
Marriage, children needs, housing requirements, further impact our family links. We find ourselves in another family, another dynamic and one which our roles now mirror that of our parents. But now the decisions are ours. Should a breakup occur than all are negatively tarnished?
Work is another area closely linked to how the world imposes itself upon your psyche.
In all of these situations outside of your first home life, you find yourself forever adjusting, evaluating, your circumstances, your role, the demands, the sacrifices, the desires, your expectations and needs.
So when that fatal day when you both decide to part becomes a reality then all the ramifications start to coalesce and make themselves manifest as time goes by.
To go through this in your thirties and forties is horrendous, but at some future point as your circumstances change a flicker of hope and a rekindling of self belief gives you the strength to pick up the pieces and flash that smile once again to a waiting world.
For the friend, I met in the builders merchants buying I know not what, she may be unable to pick up the pieces and flash that smile to a patiently waiting world!
