It felt like destiny. We were like two sides of a coin, sharing so much in common. He knew exactly what to say, how to say it, and when to say it. The attention he lavished on me felt like a dream come true. Deep down, I knew this boy could be my downfall, yet I still wanted him. I craved the attention and longed for a love that would sweep me off my feet.

I met him at a trade fair, one that happens once a year. He approached me, introducing himself as Femi, and expressed his desire for us to be friends. I should have run; I should have fled like Joseph did when Potiphar's wife made advances at him. But every girl, I suppose, must encounter her fair share of a Yoruba demon. His voice, his face, his physique—it was everything I ever wanted in a guy. He knew he was attractive, and I admired his confidence. We began talking, and I decided to give him a chance. It was my very first relationship. Perhaps I was insecure; it was the first time a boy as handsome as he was professed love for me, or perhaps it was all in my head, and he never meant it at all.

Femi was a typical bad boy. He had money and indulged in reckless behaviors—drinking, smoking, and partying. He was every girl’s dream. Being with him was exhilarating yet uncomfortable. There were many times I felt like running away, but I didn’t. I was lost in love until our blooming romance became a disaster.

After meeting at the trade fair, we started dating. I was in my second year of university, while he was in his final year. Although I lived on campus and he lived off campus, we would meet outside my hostel and chat before he headed home. Our relationship went smoothly for a month; we were constantly on the phone with each other. Then, he suggested meeting at night. He said he had something to do on campus throughout the night, and we could meet for 30 minutes.

I agreed, and we met at a popular spot. After we met, he reached for a hug. We hugged and walked, holding hands tightly, as if our lives depended on it. It felt nice and right until he started reaching for my waist and pulling me closer. I told myself it was okay since he was my boyfriend. I made excuses in my head, convincing myself he wanted nothing but my company. He led me to a secluded place, saying we needed privacy to avoid disturbances. I trusted him, so I thought it was fine. We talked about everything and nothing until I felt his breath on my neck. I didn’t realize how close he had gotten. Startled, I moved away, but he kept closing the distance.

He looked into my eyes, touched my hair, and I saw the desire in his eyes. He wanted more than my company; he didn’t even try to hide it. He kept getting closer and eventually grabbed my neck, kissing me with a bite. I knew it was my cue to leave, but I didn’t. Part of me was curious, and I didn’t know how to tell him I was uncomfortable. I didn’t want him to be angry, so I stayed and let him do his thing.

Eventually, I told him it was late and time for me to go. He agreed, but as soon as I stood up, he reached for my thighs. Startled, I pushed him away. His face twisted with anger, making my stomach drop. I regretted pushing him away, fearing I’d overreacted. He called me childish, saying I needed to let loose if I wanted to be his girlfriend. He manipulated me into thinking it was my fault. “You’re just a foolish girl who can’t realize how much I love you,” he said. Foolishly, I apologized and told him I was tired. He let me go, saying he wasn’t mad anymore.

After that night, our once blossoming love turned cold. He became distant, always too busy, taking days to respond to my texts, often leaving me unread. It felt like he had blocked me out of his world. I was heartbroken, distressed, and hurt. I thought he loved me, but all the promises and affection we shared vanished. I thought what we had was real, but I guess it wasn’t. He ghosted me, disappearing as if I was nothing, as if what we had meant nothing.

It made me wonder: Isn’t there more to love and romance than sex? Romance should not just be about physical intimacy but also about communication, affection, support, acts of kindness, emotional intimacy, and quality time. We all deserve the right person to love. True love conquers all.

Tobie💙

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