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With love, From London (Part 1)
After struggling with life for the past couple of months, I have gathered enough courage and mental stability to pen down the thoughts that were haunting me for quite sometime and here it comes. Before scrolling down, read it from the perspective of a 24 year old (well I'm nearing to 25, doesn't matter tho) woman who is trying to cope up with adulting and it's phases.
I know it's been so long, so let's start with "how are you my fellow beings?" Yeah I can imagine you sighing after hearing this question (trust me, I feel it). Don't worry I'm not going to take you to a depressive note of how life has become a mini tragedy. Instead I want to tell you how to lift you up from the bad vibes you get (as if I'm a psychiatrist with thorough knowledge in personality development and healing, nah I'm not). Come on guys, at least you can hear my story of surviving the most complex stage of life (damn, I hate being an adult @25). Okay let's begin this before I drag you into traumas of adulthood.
During the most crucial days in life, I have travelled to many places, lived with people I barely knew, ate food I never thought I would eat, did "stand-sleeping" when my body couldn't afford walking an inch. But all of these happened somewhere I felt like home. I know every place you go is not your home but there are things, people, or situations, all of those that make you feel like you are home. Not in my dreams, I thought of moving to a foreign country, that too alone. I emphasis the word 'alone' here because I have always been attached to some people or places. Be it my friends, family, or hometown, I always had something to hold on. But everything felt different when I reached one of the best cities in the world.
When I moved to London for studies, I felt like I have left a bigger part of my life in India. People I loved, things I adored, places where I spent my time, food I craved for - leaving everything and coming to a totally different country, all alone by myself was a real struggle. Somedays I used to dream about waking up in my own room, yawning under my favourite white blanket, calling out my grandmother's name. Then there are some days, I wake up with a heavy heart, thinking about the days I have to survive in this country, counting the days to pass and nights to end. Living in a country you have only seen in movies is dream for many, I'm no different. Let's say that I'm also living my dream but not exactly as I dreamt of.
In this dream I'm alone among a big group of people. I talk, I laugh, I dance, I cook, I do a lot of happy things but all my real happiness lies somewhere else, somewhere far, somewhere beautiful, somewhere I actually intend to live a peaceful and...... okay this is gonna sound out of context but a "rocking life" may be?! I don't know, all felt different. The air, the faces, the roads, the houses, everything in London reminded me that I miss my home land a lot more than I thought. So, after going through a lot of thought processes, I decided to fly back to where I actually belong.
To be continued...
© athmasakhi
I know it's been so long, so let's start with "how are you my fellow beings?" Yeah I can imagine you sighing after hearing this question (trust me, I feel it). Don't worry I'm not going to take you to a depressive note of how life has become a mini tragedy. Instead I want to tell you how to lift you up from the bad vibes you get (as if I'm a psychiatrist with thorough knowledge in personality development and healing, nah I'm not). Come on guys, at least you can hear my story of surviving the most complex stage of life (damn, I hate being an adult @25). Okay let's begin this before I drag you into traumas of adulthood.
During the most crucial days in life, I have travelled to many places, lived with people I barely knew, ate food I never thought I would eat, did "stand-sleeping" when my body couldn't afford walking an inch. But all of these happened somewhere I felt like home. I know every place you go is not your home but there are things, people, or situations, all of those that make you feel like you are home. Not in my dreams, I thought of moving to a foreign country, that too alone. I emphasis the word 'alone' here because I have always been attached to some people or places. Be it my friends, family, or hometown, I always had something to hold on. But everything felt different when I reached one of the best cities in the world.
When I moved to London for studies, I felt like I have left a bigger part of my life in India. People I loved, things I adored, places where I spent my time, food I craved for - leaving everything and coming to a totally different country, all alone by myself was a real struggle. Somedays I used to dream about waking up in my own room, yawning under my favourite white blanket, calling out my grandmother's name. Then there are some days, I wake up with a heavy heart, thinking about the days I have to survive in this country, counting the days to pass and nights to end. Living in a country you have only seen in movies is dream for many, I'm no different. Let's say that I'm also living my dream but not exactly as I dreamt of.
In this dream I'm alone among a big group of people. I talk, I laugh, I dance, I cook, I do a lot of happy things but all my real happiness lies somewhere else, somewhere far, somewhere beautiful, somewhere I actually intend to live a peaceful and...... okay this is gonna sound out of context but a "rocking life" may be?! I don't know, all felt different. The air, the faces, the roads, the houses, everything in London reminded me that I miss my home land a lot more than I thought. So, after going through a lot of thought processes, I decided to fly back to where I actually belong.
To be continued...
© athmasakhi
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