I was a child


I was a child, introduced to cartoon fiction characters at the age of 5. I recalled watching a show like, what we call nowadays Transformers. Well there was a show by the name, ( Kikaida) in Japan. In this show there was a character, named Heart Woman, whom when turned into her character, would have heart breast shoot out! I found this to be quite interesting. I, at an early age of 5, seemed to find that the woman in the character was very interesting, beautiful. I believe at that time I was having feelings of the same sex. I believed that the emotions I was feeling was an attraction to the same sex. I had seen male figures, but I had no interest in the feelings that I seemed to have for the females. It seemed as if I connected to the female side, but I did not know what these feelings were. I tried to fight these feelings towards the female gender, but as years progressed, I found it quite difficult to shake the feelings of attraction towards the female species. As the years passed, I had encountered a huge catastrophe in my life. I was molested by a family member, whom was the son of a pastor. This took a brutal hit to my whole entire being. I then found myself, not at ease around male figures. Instead of telling, I hid it and was living with massive shame for something I had no control over. The robbing of my innocence had left me in complete need of a mother’s...