Its strange, how life moves. It stumbles you sometimes, thrills you sometimes.
I am not comfortable with people. They drain my energy most of the times. But I love them. I like to celebrate their most peculiar differences and intricacies, I admire each of them, I love them so secretly in ways that they will never ever imagine. I don't know if that's everyone's case though. I hate crowds and crave connections at the same time. Most of the time, since my childhood, I just wanted to be in my own company, maybe because the slightest things hurt me deeply and people can be too sharp often, which is not my subject of ease. I give too much sometimes, other times I just go into my shell, it's safe there.
But from long I have not been enjoying my own company like the old times, I find myself inside webs of thoughts, fears, insecurities and pain that I started hating to be by myself. Trying to get distracted from myself, in a desperate try for silencing the voices inside, I just feel I have long lost myself.
I just long to come home, back to myself.


Ps: Do you feel this too? or have you ever felt like this? Do share your thoughts. Lets help each other. Sometimes it's just healing to let it out, soothes ourselves.
Love and healing for all.