🤗
Holy s*** I was cleaning out my closet I found an old bag and it had 1981 on it 😳
I opened it up and there was all kinds of cool s*** in there from back in the day but the coolest thing and I can't believe I found it......
MY VIRGINITY 😀
I found it I lost it and there IT was....
So now I don't know what to do with it 🤔I was going to have a yard sale but I ain't that kind of guy 🤨
So I have a dilemma what do I do....😀
☝
I got it , A CONTEST👍
SO.....ONE used BUT found virginity attached to a 55-year-old single male twice divorced low miles great sense of humor,house trained good cook excellent conversationist, not too bad on the eyes IF you squint...
In good condition well maintained I got all my shots no diseases 🤔.....HOLD ON..........
All right I'm back ☝NOPE... I got no diseases .... So how are we going to pick the winner 🤨
Man.... I gave it away for free last time, But that was a lot of work.... !!! 😃 I GOT IT ☝ OKAY, LADIES, SEND ME some pictures of YOURSELVES NAKED, AND be creative make that face, YOOOOU know what I'm talking about & makes sure you look into the camera that's important☝props don't hurt just keep it sexy , audio helps A LOT 😉 I'll pick the winner Friday night 🤙

Later that week...👇

🤔
Well it turns out nobody's participating in the contest 😳
Okay I'm not insulted (YEAH I'M TOTALLY INSULTED) So now I'm going to have to change everything up I'll give $1,000 to any woman who takes my found virginity 👍
Just look at it this way it'll be quicker than getting Car Insurance from that lizard 😉

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