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Beyond the cutting words



*The Cruelty of Judgment*


We live in a world where people are mercilessly judged based on superficial factors. Heartless questions and comments cut deepest, leaving scars that never fully heal. This culture of cruelty has become normalized, perpetuating damage that can last a lifetime.


*The Pain of Thoughtless Questions*


"Are you still single?"
"Why no kids?"
"What's wrong with you that you can't find a job?"


These thoughtless queries imply that one's worth is tied to relationship status, family situation, or career. They unleash venomous daggers that pierce the soul, perpetuating damaging stereotypes and biases.


Imagine being asked these questions repeatedly, with no regard for your feelings. The weight of judgment crushes your self-worth, making you question your value as a person.


*The Silent Struggle of Women Without Children*


Consider the silent struggles of a woman without children, surrounded by younger peers who have already built families. Her pain is palpable, yet ignored. She's constantly reminded of her "inadequacy" by society's cruel standards.


Every baby shower, every child's birthday party, every family gathering is a painful reminder of what she doesn't have. The pressure to conform to societal norms is overwhelming.


Don't dare ask her, "What's stopping you from having kids?" or "Why don't you have kids?" That question is a vicious slap, pouring salt into an open wound. You can't see her hurt, but it's there, festering.


*Surviving a Cruel Society*


The single ones without kids are survivors of a cruel society, treated like outcasts for their circumstances. Their silence is met with judgment, not compassion.


Their unseen wounds run deep:


- The ache of empty arms
- The sting of thoughtless questions
- The weight of unmet expectations
- The crushing feeling of being invisible


*The Impact of Judgment*


Judgment has devastating consequences:


- Eroding self-worth
- Fueling anxiety and depression
- Damaging relationships
- Perpetuating societal biases


*Breaking the Cycle*


We must confront the cruelty we inflict on others. Let's choose empathy over judgment, compassion over heartlessness.


- Ask meaningful questions: "How can I support you?", "What do you need to heal?", "How can I help you rise above?"
- Listen without judgment
- Offer kindness and understanding


*The Power of Empathy*


Empathy has the power to heal:


- Validate feelings
- Challenge societal norms
- Foster inclusivity
- Encourage vulnerability


*Creating a Culture of Compassion*


We can create a world where everyone feels valued:


- Educate yourself on societal biases
- Challenge thoughtless questions
- Support marginalized communities
- Practice self-compassion


*Conclusion*


The cruelty of judgment must end. Let's rise above thoughtless questions and heartless comments. Let's choose empathy, compassion, and understanding.

By Bongekile Ntuli (Bongi)
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