I could write about it in a journal, but I don't know if anyone would ever read it. I've worked with the same Therapist for well over a decade, and learned many things. I've worked with a Psychiatrist as long, as well. I've learned that for one thing, I don't like being over medicated.
It's a hard life for those of us chastised for having any kind of "Mental Health" Diagnosis, but many of us who are on the stage or in a spotlight have been working hard to teach others that we pay more attention and work harder on our Mental Health than those who aren't able to, or choose not to face their Demons.
I'm 58 years old now. If I could figure out a way to permanently erase any memories of what was done to me as a child, I don't know that I would. This life must be lived. I could choose to attempt a life of what I affectionately call "Sheep". Plotting out my life like a sort of Monopoly Game. But, I know that in this life, what I have been given is an opportunity to claim my strength. My perseverance, tenacity, and sheer will have kept me alive thus far. I am well aware that many times in our lives, when we are given an opportunity to grow, it can be very painful.
If I had the resources and intellect to hire attorneys, and other support staff to create a life for myself that would offer me a situation, where I would never again have to worry about how to keep a roof over my head, food, and supplies to live out the rest of my life I would certainly do so. But, the way things are now with a Global Pandemic, and an ever mounting failure to correct Global Destruction - which I know is not 100% the fault of humanity - I am only able to learn what I can from my life's lessons and keep striving to not only survive but at least learn to enjoy some small things and be ever grateful for it.

Yesterday, I happened to take a picture of my backside. I never thought that I had a cute backside until a lover told me once in my mid forties that I did. I...