Enemy or Friend? (I would appreciate any feedback)
It all began one snowy December afternoon. Jason Fox was at his house arguing with his mother. “I am not a kid! I am eighteen!” Exclaimed Jason.
“Your behavior is very childish! Go to your room!” Sophie (Jason’s mom) exclaimed.
“Yes ma’am,” Jason said sarcastically and stomped to his room. Ethan was in an alleyway, making a phone call that would change the rest of his life.
“Ethan, I want you to break into that car at the Fox families’ house, and sabotage the lock mechanism and the engine function,” Maverick (a criminal in jail) whispered into the phone he had hidden in his jail cell, “Remember if you don’t do what I say, your parents will get it!”
“ On my way there now, Maverick!” Ethan replied into the phone boldly, (but feeling so nervous and upset on the inside that he had to do this since he would never want to hurt anybody). Ethan headed over to Jason’s house and sabotaged the lock mechanism and the engine of the Fox family’s car.
Jason got in his car on his way to the coffee shop for his date with Harmony (his girlfriend). He was driving over the train tracks when all of a sudden, his car stalled. The barriers on the train track went down and the train was almost there. “Oh no, oh no! I can’t believe this!” Jason thought as he tried to open his doors. “I knew the lock was acting funny earlier! What am I going to do?” He thought to himself as he realized the doors were not going to budge. He picked up the wrench that was in the back seat and started banging on the windows, but they wouldn’t break, since, after all, they were bulletproof. The train started blowing its whistle trying to stop. It couldn’t stop fast enough and was heading straight for him! Ethan was sitting behind a bush watching this, unsure if he could go through with this.
“I can't just watch him die! I can't believe this, but I am going to go save him!” Ethan thought to himself. Ethan ran to the car with a metal pole in his hands and started banging on the window. After what felt like forever, he banged a hole in the window, and the glass shattered everywhere. He pulled Jason out of the car, through the window, and out of the way right as the train hit Jason’s car! Jason sat on the ground beside the tracks, but far enough that he couldn’t get hurt. Ethan was wearing a hoodie and a bandana across the bottom part of his face so that Jason couldn’t see more than his eyes.
“A-r--re you o-o-ok?” Ethan asked with a terrified expression in his eyes, and his voice trembling as he thought about how much worse this could have been.
“Yes, thanks to you though! If you hadn’t shown up, I would have died!” Jason exclaimed.
“Y-y-your welcome!” Ethan replied nervously hoping that Jason wouldn’t ask any questions.
“What’s your name?” Jason asked him.
“Uhm....” Ethan was still in too much shock to give a proper answer, so he decided to just run, “I gotta run!” Ethan replied as he started to run away.
“Come back!” Jason yelled as he began to run after him. Ethan ran as fast as he could but eventually got cornered by Jason in an alley. “Why are you running? You just saved my life! I am not going to get you in trouble. Please just tell me your name and take off the hoodie!” Jason shouted at him.
“I…I… can’t tell you! I am already going to be in enough trouble for helping you if…finds out!” Ethan said leaving the blank in the sentence. “Just let me through! I don’t want to hurt you!” He exclaimed while...
“Your behavior is very childish! Go to your room!” Sophie (Jason’s mom) exclaimed.
“Yes ma’am,” Jason said sarcastically and stomped to his room. Ethan was in an alleyway, making a phone call that would change the rest of his life.
“Ethan, I want you to break into that car at the Fox families’ house, and sabotage the lock mechanism and the engine function,” Maverick (a criminal in jail) whispered into the phone he had hidden in his jail cell, “Remember if you don’t do what I say, your parents will get it!”
“ On my way there now, Maverick!” Ethan replied into the phone boldly, (but feeling so nervous and upset on the inside that he had to do this since he would never want to hurt anybody). Ethan headed over to Jason’s house and sabotaged the lock mechanism and the engine of the Fox family’s car.
Jason got in his car on his way to the coffee shop for his date with Harmony (his girlfriend). He was driving over the train tracks when all of a sudden, his car stalled. The barriers on the train track went down and the train was almost there. “Oh no, oh no! I can’t believe this!” Jason thought as he tried to open his doors. “I knew the lock was acting funny earlier! What am I going to do?” He thought to himself as he realized the doors were not going to budge. He picked up the wrench that was in the back seat and started banging on the windows, but they wouldn’t break, since, after all, they were bulletproof. The train started blowing its whistle trying to stop. It couldn’t stop fast enough and was heading straight for him! Ethan was sitting behind a bush watching this, unsure if he could go through with this.
“I can't just watch him die! I can't believe this, but I am going to go save him!” Ethan thought to himself. Ethan ran to the car with a metal pole in his hands and started banging on the window. After what felt like forever, he banged a hole in the window, and the glass shattered everywhere. He pulled Jason out of the car, through the window, and out of the way right as the train hit Jason’s car! Jason sat on the ground beside the tracks, but far enough that he couldn’t get hurt. Ethan was wearing a hoodie and a bandana across the bottom part of his face so that Jason couldn’t see more than his eyes.
“A-r--re you o-o-ok?” Ethan asked with a terrified expression in his eyes, and his voice trembling as he thought about how much worse this could have been.
“Yes, thanks to you though! If you hadn’t shown up, I would have died!” Jason exclaimed.
“Y-y-your welcome!” Ethan replied nervously hoping that Jason wouldn’t ask any questions.
“What’s your name?” Jason asked him.
“Uhm....” Ethan was still in too much shock to give a proper answer, so he decided to just run, “I gotta run!” Ethan replied as he started to run away.
“Come back!” Jason yelled as he began to run after him. Ethan ran as fast as he could but eventually got cornered by Jason in an alley. “Why are you running? You just saved my life! I am not going to get you in trouble. Please just tell me your name and take off the hoodie!” Jason shouted at him.
“I…I… can’t tell you! I am already going to be in enough trouble for helping you if…finds out!” Ethan said leaving the blank in the sentence. “Just let me through! I don’t want to hurt you!” He exclaimed while...