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🌷Zora🌷
I started watching this series called “Greenleaf” it was created by a playwright named Craig Wright, but it was featured on Oprah Winfrey’s network (OWN), at first I wasn’t interested in this series whatsoever. Not that it wasn’t interesting, it was just a lot going on and it just couldn’t hold my attention. What grabbed and held my attention was Zora Greenleaf’s storyline. She was in a abusive relationship at a young age. I was very confused at first. I was thinking “how is this happening?”, “Why won’t she just block the boy?”, “Why does she keep going back to the boy after he has hurt her and disrespected her multiple times?”. I didn’t understand it. I didn’t understand her. From the outside looking in of every situation where I saw a woman being mistreated by a man, allowing themselves to be mistreated by a man, refusing to leave the man alone because they love him so much (no matter how much he hurts her), etc. I didn’t understand it. I’ve always said to myself “I would never allow a man to treat me that way”, “If I was her I would’ve did this or that”, “If I was her I would’ve left”, etc. I added my little two cents not knowing or not understanding that could easily be me. Soon enough I found out.
Zora’s story was interesting to me. She came from a two parent household, her family were well known in church, she grew up in church, she lived in a nice home, she attended a nice school, she had the cutest hairstyles and clothes. From the outside looking in it appeared that she had it all. Yet she still felt like she was lacking something. Perhaps it was attention from her parents, or maybe she felt trapped in her own reality, or maybe she just didn’t love herself even though she had everything. Perhaps she was still unhappy within. Originally her cousin Sophia had a crush on this boy named Isaiah Hambrick, Zora was aware of Sophia’s crush, Sophia was too shy to interact with Isaiah on her own, so Zora helped her out.
Zora and Isaiah ended up hitting it off more than Isaiah and Sophia even had the chance. He took immediate interest in Zora considering who she and her family was inside of the church. Isaiah sang gospel songs but outside of those gospel songs he was far from holy. He was a church boy with not enough church in him. Zora liked the attention she was getting from Isaiah, completely forgetting all about her cousin and her little crush. Sophia was upset, but she still supported Zora no matter what. Zora and Isaiah started to get close, and then things started going downhill, Zora spent a lot of time with Isaiah. Isaiah started controlling what she did, what she consumed in her body, what she wore, where she hung out, etc. He wanted tons of access to her, and she dropped important things to her for him too.
It first started with him telling her to shut up when he was recording music in the studio after he asked her for her honest opinion about his song, he peer pressured her into having sex with him (maybe it started after the sex because he got what he wanted), he slammed his brakes really hard in his car causing her to hit her head on his dashboard (he blamed her for not having her seatbelt on not even concerned about him causing her to hurt herself), he slapped her, he pushed her really hard into a pole causing her to bruise up her back badly, he has disrespected her grandmother, her dad, her mom(threw the phone her mom gave her out of his car window), called her boring in bed, never claimed her as his girlfriend publicly, had girls sit on his lap, yelled at her, wanted her to not attend the cotillion even though it was something she really wanted to do, embarrassed her in front of his friends, he would get mad at her for making mistakes, etc. He did all of that and Zora still stayed. She still loved him I didn’t get it. He was bad company for her, and eventually it corrupted her character; she ended up stealing money from the church’s tithes offering to buy herself a phone after her dad took hers away to keep her from contacting Isaiah as he was not good for her, she started to get mad at whoever kept her and Isaiah apart, saying hurtful things to her cousin and parents who were only trying to protect her, she ran away from home just to be with him, she started lying more about where she was to her parents, etc. I was so confused on how all of this was happening to this girl.
She was really young, and it just made no sense to me on how she was allowing all of this to happen. It made no sense to me on why she stayed. It didn’t start to make sense to me until I became her. I became Zora. I understood her. I understood her more when I became her. My story was a lot similar to hers. I was peer pressured into having sex. I’ve probably been through almost everything she been through except for the physical abuse. It was more mental and verbal abuse for me. The guy called me names, made a 13 minute audio confessing his love for my friend in college, embarrassed me publicly, said every horrible thing there is to me, told me during one of our breaks that he intended on having sex with another girl, caused me to lose friendships, caused friction between me and my mom, got me involved with the on campus security, got me involved in conflict with my roomates and him, yelled at me, asked a girl out claiming he forgot I was his girlfriend, got upset with me for still being in his bed when he brought a girl to his room, told me how he thought my friend was better looking than me, called other girls sexy in front of me, yelled at me publicly, threw personal things I’ve told him in my face, said he settled with me, said he hated me, called me a cancer in his life, refused to give back my laptop I allowed him to borrow, wouldn’t appreciate gifts I would get for him, would throw me away easily, said that I was “nothing” to him, told me I should kill myself, called me useless, pathetic, worthless, asked a girl out in front of me, told me about the other girls he wanted that weren’t me, told me that he tolerated me instead of wanted me, etc. And like Zora I kept going back, like Zora I gave my guy at that time several chances, like Zora I still loved him, it didn’t matter what he did I still wanted him.
No matter what he did I couldn’t let go of him.
No matter how many tears I cried, I still craved his embrace, his voice, moments with him, etc. I must’ve been stupid.
I must’ve been blind.
I traded in my self respect for love and attention.
I traded in my morals for consistent heartbreak.
I became Zora Greenleaf.
I kept going back to a guy that hurt me over and over.
I couldn’t let him go.
When I experienced this experience for myself I realized that any woman can become Zora Greenleaf.
We may think something will never happen to us.
We may think a situation could never be us.
We just never know until we know.
I finally understand Zora.
She was in love.
Love is indeed blind.
She was head over heels for Isaiah.
She was obsessed with the feeling of their first encounter.
That was her high.
She desperately tried getting that high back.
She hoped he would be the boy she fell in love with when they first met.
With women we tend to always hold on to hope.
We hope we could get back the boy or man that we fell in love with in the beginning.
We hope he can change.
We hope we can change him.
No matter what kind of ugly things he has done or said to us, we still see the beauty in him from when we first met him.
We still see the beauty in him when he isn’t mean.
I’ve learned that sometimes when we hope and hope and hope it is the very beginning of us losing ourselves.
As women we often lose ourself in hope.
Hope doesn’t always fix things.
Sometimes hope makes things much worse.
There’s a such thing as too much hope.
In situations like these we have too much hope. When we have too much hope in these situations it is only the beginning of our first of many heartbreaks.
What I liked about Zora was when she finally had enough she left Isaiah.
She left him and she never looked back.
Like Zora us women that has gone through or that are currently going through an abusive relationship, we can rise.
We can rise above the abuse.
I’ve learned that anyone can be a Zora.
Unfortunately, many of us have been or will be Zora.
Not everyone makes it out like Zora did though, but it’s not impossible.
It’s not impossible to say “I don’t want to be Zora anymore” and walk away from the abusive relationship.
Or it’s not impossible to be Zora and finally have the courage to leave a relationship that’s only drowning you instead of watering you.
In life, women will have a choice on which Zora they’d like to be when dealing with these circumstances.-W.O.S.
© No copyright
Zora’s story was interesting to me. She came from a two parent household, her family were well known in church, she grew up in church, she lived in a nice home, she attended a nice school, she had the cutest hairstyles and clothes. From the outside looking in it appeared that she had it all. Yet she still felt like she was lacking something. Perhaps it was attention from her parents, or maybe she felt trapped in her own reality, or maybe she just didn’t love herself even though she had everything. Perhaps she was still unhappy within. Originally her cousin Sophia had a crush on this boy named Isaiah Hambrick, Zora was aware of Sophia’s crush, Sophia was too shy to interact with Isaiah on her own, so Zora helped her out.
Zora and Isaiah ended up hitting it off more than Isaiah and Sophia even had the chance. He took immediate interest in Zora considering who she and her family was inside of the church. Isaiah sang gospel songs but outside of those gospel songs he was far from holy. He was a church boy with not enough church in him. Zora liked the attention she was getting from Isaiah, completely forgetting all about her cousin and her little crush. Sophia was upset, but she still supported Zora no matter what. Zora and Isaiah started to get close, and then things started going downhill, Zora spent a lot of time with Isaiah. Isaiah started controlling what she did, what she consumed in her body, what she wore, where she hung out, etc. He wanted tons of access to her, and she dropped important things to her for him too.
It first started with him telling her to shut up when he was recording music in the studio after he asked her for her honest opinion about his song, he peer pressured her into having sex with him (maybe it started after the sex because he got what he wanted), he slammed his brakes really hard in his car causing her to hit her head on his dashboard (he blamed her for not having her seatbelt on not even concerned about him causing her to hurt herself), he slapped her, he pushed her really hard into a pole causing her to bruise up her back badly, he has disrespected her grandmother, her dad, her mom(threw the phone her mom gave her out of his car window), called her boring in bed, never claimed her as his girlfriend publicly, had girls sit on his lap, yelled at her, wanted her to not attend the cotillion even though it was something she really wanted to do, embarrassed her in front of his friends, he would get mad at her for making mistakes, etc. He did all of that and Zora still stayed. She still loved him I didn’t get it. He was bad company for her, and eventually it corrupted her character; she ended up stealing money from the church’s tithes offering to buy herself a phone after her dad took hers away to keep her from contacting Isaiah as he was not good for her, she started to get mad at whoever kept her and Isaiah apart, saying hurtful things to her cousin and parents who were only trying to protect her, she ran away from home just to be with him, she started lying more about where she was to her parents, etc. I was so confused on how all of this was happening to this girl.
She was really young, and it just made no sense to me on how she was allowing all of this to happen. It made no sense to me on why she stayed. It didn’t start to make sense to me until I became her. I became Zora. I understood her. I understood her more when I became her. My story was a lot similar to hers. I was peer pressured into having sex. I’ve probably been through almost everything she been through except for the physical abuse. It was more mental and verbal abuse for me. The guy called me names, made a 13 minute audio confessing his love for my friend in college, embarrassed me publicly, said every horrible thing there is to me, told me during one of our breaks that he intended on having sex with another girl, caused me to lose friendships, caused friction between me and my mom, got me involved with the on campus security, got me involved in conflict with my roomates and him, yelled at me, asked a girl out claiming he forgot I was his girlfriend, got upset with me for still being in his bed when he brought a girl to his room, told me how he thought my friend was better looking than me, called other girls sexy in front of me, yelled at me publicly, threw personal things I’ve told him in my face, said he settled with me, said he hated me, called me a cancer in his life, refused to give back my laptop I allowed him to borrow, wouldn’t appreciate gifts I would get for him, would throw me away easily, said that I was “nothing” to him, told me I should kill myself, called me useless, pathetic, worthless, asked a girl out in front of me, told me about the other girls he wanted that weren’t me, told me that he tolerated me instead of wanted me, etc. And like Zora I kept going back, like Zora I gave my guy at that time several chances, like Zora I still loved him, it didn’t matter what he did I still wanted him.
No matter what he did I couldn’t let go of him.
No matter how many tears I cried, I still craved his embrace, his voice, moments with him, etc. I must’ve been stupid.
I must’ve been blind.
I traded in my self respect for love and attention.
I traded in my morals for consistent heartbreak.
I became Zora Greenleaf.
I kept going back to a guy that hurt me over and over.
I couldn’t let him go.
When I experienced this experience for myself I realized that any woman can become Zora Greenleaf.
We may think something will never happen to us.
We may think a situation could never be us.
We just never know until we know.
I finally understand Zora.
She was in love.
Love is indeed blind.
She was head over heels for Isaiah.
She was obsessed with the feeling of their first encounter.
That was her high.
She desperately tried getting that high back.
She hoped he would be the boy she fell in love with when they first met.
With women we tend to always hold on to hope.
We hope we could get back the boy or man that we fell in love with in the beginning.
We hope he can change.
We hope we can change him.
No matter what kind of ugly things he has done or said to us, we still see the beauty in him from when we first met him.
We still see the beauty in him when he isn’t mean.
I’ve learned that sometimes when we hope and hope and hope it is the very beginning of us losing ourselves.
As women we often lose ourself in hope.
Hope doesn’t always fix things.
Sometimes hope makes things much worse.
There’s a such thing as too much hope.
In situations like these we have too much hope. When we have too much hope in these situations it is only the beginning of our first of many heartbreaks.
What I liked about Zora was when she finally had enough she left Isaiah.
She left him and she never looked back.
Like Zora us women that has gone through or that are currently going through an abusive relationship, we can rise.
We can rise above the abuse.
I’ve learned that anyone can be a Zora.
Unfortunately, many of us have been or will be Zora.
Not everyone makes it out like Zora did though, but it’s not impossible.
It’s not impossible to say “I don’t want to be Zora anymore” and walk away from the abusive relationship.
Or it’s not impossible to be Zora and finally have the courage to leave a relationship that’s only drowning you instead of watering you.
In life, women will have a choice on which Zora they’d like to be when dealing with these circumstances.-W.O.S.
© No copyright
