7th August 1823
... it's midnight when everyone is asleep meanwhile she kept watching stars , her eyes was bleeding sadness and pain .
it wasn't easy on her , neither on me .
I remember how I kept watching her crying while I pretended I was asleep ... I wish if I hugged her but I didn't ...
she stood up and walked toward the table and start writing something ... it took her a very long time before she put the papers down and throw her self out of the window .
I was shocked but couldn't move .. I want to scream but I didn't ... I knew if I did I would...