Every afternoon this week, I've gone over to Janie's house. Mary makes sure that no one walks in on us, and we're really grateful for her help.

I'm in the girls' bathroom at school, and Lucy corners me. "You spend all of your time with Janie these days. It's like I don't even exist anymore! I thought we were supposed to be best friends, Piper," she says.

I know I haven't been spending as much time as usual with Lucy, but I don't know how to explain it to her. "Lucy, you are my best friend. It's just... It's different with Janie," I say.

"Different how?"

I consider the situation carefully before saying, "If I tell you something, do you absolutely swear not to tell anyone else?"

"Of course."

"Janie and I are in love."

"You're what?" She's looking at me as if I have two heads.

I start to speak rapidly, so that she can't cut me off. "I don't know how it happened, but we fell in love. I've been going over to her house every day after school because we're dating each other. The thing is, no one's supposed to know, because her parents would really freak out, and they'd send her away."

"You should have told me sooner! I'm your best friend, damnit! I had a right to know!" Lucy looks really hurt, and I feel kind of bad.

At the same time, I'm relieved that this is her reaction. For a minute, I was worried that she would think it was gross that I was in love with another girl, and that she'd stop talking to me or something.

"Lucy, I'm sorry! But I told you now, right?" I ask.

"Yeah, and it's about time." Lucy pauses. Calmer, she asks, "So, what's it like? Being in love, I mean?"

I grin. "It's amazing, Lucy. Every time I see her, the butterflies start to tap dance in my stomach. She makes me so happy. When she kisses me, it's like the whole world stops, and everything's just so completely perfect."p

"Ew, you actually kissed her?" Jennifer Reese demands, stepping out of one of the stalls.

"Oh crap," I say under my breath.

"That is so nasty!" She hurries out of the bathroom.

"Oh my God... It's going to be all over the school by next period," I say with a sigh.

"Piper, it'll be okay," Lucy says soothingly. "I'm sure she won't tell anyone."

"Lucy, this is Jennifer Reese. She's, like, the most popular girl in our class. You know she lives for gossip. Oh God, what am I gonna do?" I'm completely panicking now.

"It'll be okay," Lucy says again. "I'm sure of it." With one arm around my shoulders, Lucy guides me out of the bathroom.

~~~*~~~

It's the end of the day, and it seems that everyone knows what's going on. Whenever I walk by, students say things under their breath and stare at me.

I tell Janie what's happened. "I don't care," Janie says stubbornly. "I love you, Piper, and I don't care what they think. You mean more to me than some stupid middle school gossip. They'll get over it." I'm relieved that she feels this way, but I'm still really worried.

"What if someone tells your parents?" I ask.

"That won't happen. They're not smart enough to think of doing something like that," Janie replies. I don't think she's as confident as she's pretending to be, but I choose to believe her anyway.

"Don't worry, Piper," Lucy says, joining us. "No matter what happens, I'll stand by you."

"Thanks, Lucy, but now isn't the time to talk," I say dismissively. My universe is falling apart and all I want to do is hide under my covers and pretend this isn't happening.

"I just want to go home," I say.

"I'll walk you," Janie offers. I gratefully accept. Lucy follows behind us as we walk to my house.

~~~*~~~

"Hey, dykes!" Brittany Lewis, Jennifer Reese's faithful sidekick, calls as Janie and I enter the schoolyard the next morning. As usual, Lucy is behind us.

"Carpet munchers!" Kaitlyn Amos adds.

"Freaking queers!" Chris Kent, Jennifer Reese's boyfriend, shouts.

"Fags!" Ricky Zachary chips in.

"God, people like that are so nasty," Jennifer Reese says loudly.

All of the popular kids have crowded around to taunt us. The only one who's not saying anything is Hannah Vincent. She's watching everything with this detached expression on her face, like she's watching a movie or something.

Janie slips her hand into mine and we continued walking, trying to pretend we don't hear the popular kids. "Ignore them, Piper," Janie says. "They're just being stupid."

"Hey girls, can I watch?" Ricky calls after us.

"Screw you, Ricky!" Lucy shouts. "Leave them alone."

"Oh, look, Lucy's sticking up for the dykes. I guess she must be a dyke, too!" Brittany says.

"Lucy's a carpet muncher, too? Oh no, they're, like, spreading!" Kaitlyn says.

"Stay away from my girlfriend, dykes!" Chris says. I think I've started to turn red.

"People like them shouldn't be allowed to act like that in public," Jennifer says. "It's so completely disgusting!"

"Shut the hell up, Jennifer!" Lucy screams, running toward Jennifer and punching her perfect, popular little face before anyone has time to react.

Normally, I'd be thrilled to see Jennifer Reese get punched in the face, but today, I'm just annoyed with Lucy for getting involved. She's only going to make this worse for Janie and I.

"Bitch!" Jennifer shouts, pulling one of Lucy's braids so hard that Lucy cries out in pain.

"Stop it!" Hannah Vincent shouts, finally finding her voice. "Jen, stop it. She's, like, half your size. You could seriously hurt her."

"She deserves it!" Jennifer protests.

Hannah grabs Jennifer's left arm and pulls her off of Lucy. Lucy runs toward Janie and I.

"Lucy, you shouldn't have done that," I say. "You could have gotten hurt."

"I was just trying to defend you guys," Lucy replies.

"Yeah, well, don't do it again. We have enough to worry about without worrying that you're going to get yourself killed. Just ignore them," Janie says. "They aren't worth the energy."

~~~*~~~

Janie and I walk into Janie's house, as we have done every weekday afternoon for over a month. "Piper, please go home. I need to speak with my daughter in private," Mrs. Davis says. Her tone is no longer warm. Her plastic smile is nowhere to be seen. I get a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Janie," I say nervously.

"See you," Janie replies, hugging me goodbye. I can tell that she's even more nervous than I am.

An hour or so later, I get a phone call. It's Janie, and she's crying. I've never heard Janie cry before. I'm suddenly terrified. "What's wrong?" I ask.

"She knows, Piper. Someone called my mom and told her that you're a lesbian, and that she needs to keep me away from you, and she says I can't see you anymore because you're a sinner, and I tried to tell her that you're not a sinner, but she wouldn't listen." Janie has not breathed while telling me this, and now she inhales deeply. "She couldn't even say the word. She acted like she thought saying 'lesbian' would cause the apocalypse or something! God, I can't believe that this is happening!"

"Who told her?" I ask.

"I asked her, but she said it didn't matter who told her, and she won't tell me. She says she doesn't want her daughter hanging around with people like that." Janie sighs. "Little does she know that her daughter is people like that."

We have to get off the phone, because Andrew and Janie's father have come home, and Mrs. Davis is going to make Janie talk to them about what's going on. I can't believe what I have just been told. It's impossible. I know that this cannot be happening.

I hurry to Lucy. "Someone told Janie's parents," I say in tears. "They won't let us see each other anymore."

"Oh, Piper, I'm so sorry," Lucy says, hugging me.

"This is, like, the worst thing that has ever happened to me."

"Hey, dyke, where's your girlfriend?" Brittany asks as Lucy and I enter the schoolyard.

"God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve!" Chris calls.

"Fags get AIDS," Kaitlyn preaches.

The popular kids have surrounded me, but I barely even hear them. I am shutting the world out, thinking only about getting away from this nightmare.

"What you dykes need is a good man," Ricky says. "I'd be happy to help you in that area!"

I am not listening to them, but Lucy is, and I can tell that she's getting angry. I snap back into full awareness when she spits at Ricky.

"You're gonna regret that, bitch!" Ricky shouts, but before he can hit her, we hurry away.

Inside of the school, Lucy and I run straight into my mother. She takes us into an empty classroom. After looking at me for a moment, she says, "Piper, honey, I know how the kids are treating you, and I want to help you."

"No one can help," I say. "Everything sucks."

"Piper, sweetie, don't shut me out. You can't go through this alone. It's not easy being teased."

"She has me," Lucy points out.

"Yes, Lucy, and you are a good friend for standing by her side. I know that kids can be cruel sometimes," Mom replies.

"The kids have always been cruel to me," I say. "They just have more ammunition now."

"Piper, no matter what happens, you need to know that I'll always be here for you. You're my daughter. I love you, and no matter what, that isn't going to change. You could have told me about Janie. You didn't have to be afraid."

"Who told you?" I ask.

"Mrs. Davis called the school this morning."

"Mom," I manage, my voice cracking. I lean my head on my mother's chest, and she holds me and gently rocks me.

"Everything will work out, baby," my mother says softly. "I'm here. It's okay."

~~~*~~~

Janie is back in school. Her seat has been changed in English and science, but that doesn't stop her from passing me a note. Meet me in the third floor girls' bathroom at 2:07, it says.

At 2:07 on the dot, I enter the girls' bathroom. Janie is waiting inside.

"Piper, I'm so sorry about all of this," Janie begins.

"It's not your fault, Janie," I reply.

"I still love you. I still want us to be together," Janie says firmly.

"Me too," I tell her.

I kiss Janie, and neither one of us pulls away for several seconds. I brush my hand against Janie's right arm. She whimpers in pain, causing me to stop kissing her.

"What happened?" I ask.

"Nothing," Janie says too quickly. I know Janie well enough to know that she's hiding something.

"Janie, don't lie to me. You've never lied to me."

Janie begins to cry, and I'm surprised. I hold her, careful to avoid the bruises on her arm.
"Andrew found out about us," she says. "He doesn't approve of homosexual behavior, so he taught me a lesson."

"Oh God... Oh, Janie, I'm so sorry!"

"He's a bastard. They're all bastards, except for Mary. I hate them!" A determined look appears on Janie's beautiful pixie face. "Screw my family!" she declares. "We're going to be together, Piper."

She slips her hand into mine and we walked out of the bathroom together. Before dropping me off at my history class, Janie kisses me again.

It's only after the kiss has ended that we see Miss Christian looking at us with a disapproving expression on her face. She walks into the office and the sick feeling returns to the pit of my stomach.

~~~*~~~

It's after midnight when the phone in my bedroom rings. Groggy from sleep, I answer it, "Hello?"

"Piper, it's Janie. I only have a few seconds," Janie says.

"What's wrong?" I ask, beginning to wake up at the urgency in Janie's voice.

"My parents are sending me back to Utah to live with my grandparents," Janie explains. She's sobbing now, and my heart breaks.

"Oh my God... But they can't!" I protest.

"I can't stop them. I'm only thirteen, Piper. I don't have a choice."

"Janie... Oh God... I don't want you to go," I say pathetically. I'm crying now, too.

"I don't want to leave you. I wish it didn't have to be like this." She pauses. "Damnit, my mom's coming. I have to go. I love you, Piper. Never forget that."

"I love you, too."

"I know." She sighs. "One day, we'll see each other again. Until then, we'll be together in our dreams." She hangs up the telephone before I can say anything else.

~~~*~~~

I can't stop crying. Lucy does not leave my side. "Why? Why did someone have to go and tell her parents about us? It isn't fair!" I say.

"Maybe the person who called thought that they were helping somehow," Lucy suggests.

I pause. "What did you just say?" I ask sharply.

"I said that the person who called-"

"Lucy, I never told you that. How did you know that the person called them?"

Lucy shifts her weight uncomfortably. "I just figured it out. I mean, how else would they have told them?" Lucy is a terrible liar, and the truth shows in her eyes.

All at once, it hits me.

"Oh my God. It was you! Lucy, my God, how could you? Why would you do that to me and Janie?"

"Piper, I'm sorry. It's just, you were spending, like, every second with her, and I just wanted my best friend back!"

"I can't believe I'm hearing this." I stand up.

"Piper, wait! Let me explain!" Lucy begs.

"No! Whatever you have to say, I don't want to hear it." I walk away, vaguely aware that Lucy is on her knees and sobbing.

My head is spinning. My heart is pounding. All I want to do is leave this place forever, and forget that I ever met any of the people in my life, but I know that that's impossible.

I'm running through the hallway now, and I'm not sure where I am going. All I know is that I can't stay still, because if I do, everything will hit me, and I cannot handle that. The only thing that will help is being in Janie's arms, and holding her, and kissing her, and I know that I may never be able to do that again.

Everything hurts, and I can't breathe. I run out of the school through a side door, but I only make it to the schoolyard before I collapse into hysterical tears.

I can't move. I sit on the ground, pulling my knees to my chest, and I try to think, but nothing makes sense.

"Are you alright?" Hannah asks.

I'm startled by her voice. "No," I admit. I'm shaking.

Hannah gently takes my hand. "Come on, let's go back inside." She helps me stand up. I'm still gasping for air.

As Hannah and I enter the school, Jennifer shouts, "Hannah, what are you doing?"

"Helping her," Hannah replies.

"Why?" Brittany asks.

"Because she's a good person," Hannah says. "I'd take her as a friend over you guys any day of the week."

"Looks like Piper turned Hannah into a dyke, too," Kaitlyn says.

Hannah rolls her eyes. "Come on, Piper," she says, guiding me toward the girls' bathroom. Once we're inside, she helps me wash my face and dries my tears.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" I ask.

"You're a good person, Piper. I don't think it's right the way people have been treating you, but I was too scared to say anything before. I mean, how can you tease someone just because they love someone else? It's not right."

My voice cracks as I say, "Everyone thinks that the way I feel about Janie is a sin."

Hannah gently takes my hands in her own and looks into my eyes. "Love," she says, "is never a sin."

~~~*~~~

I can't believe what I'm seeing. Lucy has climbed up to the roof of the school and is standing on the edge. She is going to jump, and everyone is in too much shock to react.

"Lucy!" I call. "Don't do this. Please! You're better than this!"

"I'm nothing!" Lucy shouts back, her black braids flapping in the wind as tears roll down her cheeks.

I'm terrified. I don't know what to do, so I just keep talking, hoping that I'll find the right words. "No you're not! Lucy, before Janie came along, you were, like, the only person who ever treated me like I mattered!"

"I messed up, Piper! I can't fix things. I went too far. I might as well just end it."

"No, Lucy, please! You can still make things right. There's still time."

"It's too late! You were the only person I ever cared about, Piper! You were my best friend, and I hurt you so badly. I can't live with knowing that."

"Lucy, please..." I'm crying now, too.

"Piper, I'm so sorry I hurt you! I did all of this so that I wouldn't lose you, and now I might lose you anyway, and that really hurts."

"I know. Come downstairs and we'll talk, okay? We'll work this out."

Lucy does not move. "Lucy, this is crazy! You're afraid of heights, for God's sake! I know that you don't want to do this," I say.

Suddenly, Lucy looks like she's going to be sick. She tries not to look down. "Please come down, Lucy. We can't fix things if you're dead," I point out.

Taking a deep breath, Lucy begins to inch away from the edge of the roof, and I release a breath that I have not realized I've been holding. The security guards reach the roof just as Lucy reaches safety, and I know she's going to be okay.

~~~*~~~

For the first night in weeks, I am able to fall asleep. Suddenly, I feel someone watching me. I look out of my bedroom window and see Janie standing in my backyard!

Stunned, I hurry out of the house. I reach Janie, and we hug, but before either one of us can say anything, I wake up. I sit up in my bed and cry.

For once in my life, I've experienced something that the other girls in school can relate to; the loss of my first love. And in this way, I'm just like everyone else.

(The End.)

© All Rights Reserved