I am an asshole, and when I say asshole I don't mean a person that is intentionally mean or down on other people, I don't mean a person that suffers from a great lack of common sense, one who is continuously confronted with less than optimal situations because they're mentally inferior (be it by choice or by the today's generation, sheep herded mind which is perfectly content with the rapidly dissolving and progressively diminishing of not only the practice, but even the slightest recognition of- manners, values, chivalry, love "real love" kindness, selflessness, humility, the chance to discover true happiness and joy).  What I mean is I have common sense, I can read people and situations extremely well, and I will push my boundaries as far as I can, I will get away with as much as I'm possibly allowed. I am an asshole.. I am not used to hearing the word no ( because 99.9% of the time what I ask of somebody I can convince the person I'm asking that what I'm asking is not only "not that big of a deal" but almost to ridiculous to refuse) I make others feel my pain, I'm gifted in my speach and able to convey my emotions and thoughts (real or false) in such a way that I can make a person thats even the slightest bit receptive or sensitive feel what I want them to feel. I'm an asshole! I do this on purpose to get what I want, but honestly most of the time its reflex. I've been pretending so long its almost hard to bring my thoughts back to reality. I am so very different depending on who I'm talking to or what goal I am trying to accomplish, I'm not even sure if there is a real me anymore. There is a very great possibility that I am no longer the man that I was, I am a living shell of that man who is nothing more then other people's perception of the man I have led them to believe that I am. Knowing the terrible person that I was when I do remember being me, I'm not sure if being me was ever really something to be proud of anyway. Or maybe ive just done to many shrooms and to much blow...