I stepped inside in the auditorium.
The arrangements were attractive. The floors had red carpet. The lights, and decoration all was good. The main stage is filled with chairs for the dignitaries. I sat on the fourth row from the west side second floor.
I can see students ready for the performance backstage.
I saw the crowd in front. Instructors teach and touch up students at the last minute.

I typed Suchi... I reached...
After 3 mint...
Hi BhaiSa... Suchi held me behind my back. I turned around her.
Wahoo you look beautiful my little girl in this White saree with a golden border. Let me guess this is Kerala Saree! I said with a big smile on my face.
Bhai... Correct!
She quickly introduced me to her teacher and her co-friends with whom she will perform her Bharatnatyam.

By the way BhaiSa... There is a surprise for you! She winked at me while going with her friends backstage. I chucked. I have only Suchi to laugh with... She protects my heart ...my broken heart!

As the stage got filled with... I gazed at the stage.
A host welcomed all dignitaries.
I looked around the crowd beside the entrance of the stage and caught my eye on a beautiful woman... Her Jumki looked so attractive from a distance. I skipped my heartbeat the same as I had skipped on the first meeting of Swath at the City Station!
I gazed at her back, her neatly clipped chuda with Jasmine...until she was covered by some students. I failed to see her face...her neck had a necklace thread inside her blouse, and her blouse had hooks from the back...
I felt I'm missing Swath even more. I felt to call her hear her ask her if it was she... Whom iam observing so much from a distance... But it all just in a fraction of thoughts moving inside my mind.

I looked at her back... again, her arms, her gesture while talking with students...she was busy with students... All grown-up kids like Suchi.

My heartfelt to get up and go... I saw her moving towards the pillar to go in backstage.
I got up to go... Then taught of Suchi...
I heard a host saying ... Now it's time for ...Bharatnatyam by Delhi Pratibha College of Arts and Science...

I heard crowd clapping. I did the same.
I saw Suchi... She is so happy to do the perfomance. After a battle with the whole family, she reached here. Uff... Why do they restrict real talent?

After her performance, I go up to go... I suddenly felt my hands were held by a little girl sitting next to me...
"Uncle plz, see my Muma's students performing next dance... Her smile was so divine that I smiled back and sat back.

I asked about her name," My name is Revathi Nair." I smiled...
So you are from Kerala...
No... I'm from India. She giggled...
I giggled her back.
I felt my Swath said this... She always used to say... Why name state... When we are of same nation!
I asked her," Why are you sitting alone... "
She replied"To see my mothers efforts from a distance...
My mothers friend says, distance teach us more about the closer one".
I felt a pinch in my heart.
I felt my Swath said this too...

"So your mother will perform?" I asked Revathi.
"No uncle... Mummy is a dance teacher. She came with her friend. And her students." she said looking at the stage.

I observed Revathi. Her hair... Her eyes... She looks like a baby Swath... Malayalee girl in my heart, I feel her resemble every Malayalee girl". I smiled and looked at the performance.
As the program went on... I was talking with that girl, listening to her... I felt good after so long time. I miss the days when I used to simply enjoy listening to Swath.

"Uncle... You are married?" She asked me holding my hand and checking for the ring.
I said "no"... With a giggle.
"Wahoo...My mumma ask always to her friend to get married... If you are ready I will tell mommy that you are single..."
I laughed at her innocent age and talk like a granny.

"Well... Who is your mamma's friend..." I asked her teasing a little.
She said... "It's Swa"... She stopped in between and raised to run towards her mother...
" Hey ...I said... I was blank as I was not sure what she said Swa.. '

"Mummy, I was with this uncle... We talked a lot... " that girl pointed her index finger toward me and introduced me.
" I looked at her mother. And smiled. "Hello... Sorry, she must have disturbed you... She talks a lot. " her Mother said holding the little hand of Revathi.
I smiled and said, "All girls talk too much!".

As I turned to go... I sensed a deep holding in my heart. I thought to turn... But I ignored it. I checked my inbox... Filled with queries.

As I mixed with the crowd towards exist door....
I heard the host saying...
"Thank you Miss...Swathantra Menon."
My legs and heart got a halt!
I turned and searched... My Swath... I heard right... It's Menon...
I looked at her in that crowd...
I rushed towards the stage... I saw that host holding papers in her hand and gesturing and speaking to a few students...
I stepped towards the opposite way... My heart had a little hope to see my Swath...
I cleared my throat... And I said,"
Mam... You said... Swath... ".
Sorry sir... What... She didn't heard my low voice.
As I was uttering in bit louder... My eyes went to the corner of the backstage pillar...

I felt my whole body get paralyzed... I looked at the side face of a lady wrapped in cotton Light pink and red mixed colour with beautiful white embroidery lace at the end of the saree... Her Jumka in white was swinging with her every utterance and movement... beautiful moti in white and red... Choker necklace covered her neck... I saw my Swath... Just in front... Near to the pillar covering her half...
I was lost... My eyes ran with tears to flow... I wished to jump backstage... But I didn't move a step... As I felt it like a dream!

Until I heard that little girl Revathi saying... "Hi Uncle... Do you wish to meet Swa Masi"...
I smiled and stepped up to Revathi... My face was written what I feel for Swath... I stepped closer... I stood just back of my Swath... My body shivered, and my head had to sweat...
I held Revathi's hand so tightly...

"SwaMasi... " Revathi pulled saree end of Swath... She turned to look at her ... Her eyebrows went up to listen Revathi...
"Look this uncle wants to see you"... Revathi rolled her eyes towards me, waving my hand in a pendulum motion.

Swath looked at me... I looked into her eyes... Her shocked face... Her expression of surprise... Her love filled in eyes... Her anger in her mini mind... Her every bit...craved for me... to be her always!

The silence we felt... I looked and just looked at her....
© Saranya Anish Nair