Nma
Nma and I have been sex toys for the past four years and we are just 12 and 14.
I was the first victim of sexual abuse before Nma came along, Nma and I are best friends because we both know our unspeakable secret.
Our Economics teacher has been sexually harassing me ever since I was in junior high school, and I dare not say a word to anybody about it.
He would always make nasty jokes in class and afterward call me in to satisfy him, I was a shadow of myself ever since, I don't say a word in class, and I lack societal skills.
Each day I refused to do his bidding, I am being lashed for it, I am the second child of my parents, and they have never for once asked how I got the marks on my body.
When Nma enrolled in our school, the Economics teacher withdrew from always asking me to wait after school, and that was the best month of my life in Junior High, I was always cheerful and people began to wonder if I had this trait in me and I kept it hidden.
However, I never knew someone else took my place.
I still remember vividly the horrendous scene I saw that Tuesday afternoon.
I was having a very painful menstrual cramp that day, so I decided to go hide in the library and groan in pain, after enduring the pain for a bit I slept off, I woke up after the school bell rang for the third time for school dismissal while struggling to stand up from the chair I was sitting on, was when I heard Nma shrieking...
Nma was stripped off her clothes only left with lingerie, she was begging the Economics teacher to let her go just this once, but all the pleas fell on deaf ears, instead, he took out his belt and whipped her on her buttocks, which afterward had his way with her, I watched Nma beg and groan in pains, I understood all her dilemmas since I was once in her shoes, but she was only twelve.
I marveled at how our parents would live with us for years without even bother asking us how we were faring in school.
And I somehow blamed my parents for what I was passing through, the first time I came home with the bruises I got from Mr. Akin the Economics teacher, My mom never bothered asking how I got them, she only concluded that I took my silly behaviors to school, if only she had asked how maybe just maybe I would have told her about Mr. Akin.
During our last days in Junior High, Nma became pregnant, she was depressed and secluded, she alienate herself from everybody including me.
I tried reaching out to her on several occasions, but she just wouldn't let me in. I was confused, I pondered on what could make her draw lines between us, she would only find solace in her poems, and I never thought of reading one of the poems in the books she would always carry around.
The day before she passed on to the afterlife, Nma came to school, happy and energetic as she used to be, we spent a lot of time together she didn't want to go home after school.
During the break period that day, Nma left her most precious book where she wrote all her poems her darkest moment on my desk, I was tempted to open the book and see what was inside, the kind of poems she inscribed but I didn't instead I took the book to her, she stared at me for a while and asked...
"Did you read what's inside?"
She said in a feeble voice...
No, I didn't.
I said in a defensive voice
I don't invade people's privacy...
I added.
She looked rather disappointed but later filled her Face with smiles...
A few hours after debating whether or not to go home, she later succumbed to my request and said
"Let's go home"
She said as she held my hands tight, her hands were warm and she had a beautiful smile on her.
We walked down-home happy.
I wished I had opened that book, she wanted me to invade her privacy, but I didn't...
The Next day, I saw Nma's elder sis in school and they went straight to the principal's office, I somehow felt uncomfortable and curious about why they came, since it was odd seeing them in school like that.
A few minutes later, rumors begin to spread, that Nma was dead and she was pregnant...
I was shocked when I heard that news, my face went blank, fear crossed my face while sadness clouded my features, while fighting back tears, tears swamped my eyes and when I couldn't anymore, tears ran down my cheeks.
I couldn't think of not seeing Nma again and couldn't bear the thought, it was indecipherable.
I ran as fast as my legs could carry me to Nma's house and saw her covered with white apparel, and her book beside her, she had committed suicide, and all her feelings which she never told or showed to anyone were written down.
Her last words to me were "let's go home" but she left without me.
Rumors about a 12-year-old being pregnant and who committed suicide became the talk of the town, she was labeled irresponsible and a shame, no one talked about the fact that Mr. Akin did sexually assault her.
"What would a grown man with the full spec as a wife want in the body of a 12-year-old"
Even after her death no one believed her, Mr. Akin denied the fact he ever did, until I found the courage to speak up about mine, when I did two other girls in the age range 15 and 14 also came up and testified against him, he blamed it on the devil, though he was arrested, trialed and sentenced, Nma was still dead.
My parents felt ashamed of themselves, which they should be, and apologized, but Nma's parents never forgave themselves cause they also led her to her early grave.
Nma wrote
"When darkness engulfs me
I run to poems to find solace
When the baby in me cries
I hush its little voice,
For I have no choice
But if somehow I find light
Or just a glimpse of it,
I would follow.
But if somehow, your tiny voice is heard
We might be saved."
Listen to that silent voice, and you will hear a little cry.
Help save our girls
© Joyce Godswill
I was the first victim of sexual abuse before Nma came along, Nma and I are best friends because we both know our unspeakable secret.
Our Economics teacher has been sexually harassing me ever since I was in junior high school, and I dare not say a word to anybody about it.
He would always make nasty jokes in class and afterward call me in to satisfy him, I was a shadow of myself ever since, I don't say a word in class, and I lack societal skills.
Each day I refused to do his bidding, I am being lashed for it, I am the second child of my parents, and they have never for once asked how I got the marks on my body.
When Nma enrolled in our school, the Economics teacher withdrew from always asking me to wait after school, and that was the best month of my life in Junior High, I was always cheerful and people began to wonder if I had this trait in me and I kept it hidden.
However, I never knew someone else took my place.
I still remember vividly the horrendous scene I saw that Tuesday afternoon.
I was having a very painful menstrual cramp that day, so I decided to go hide in the library and groan in pain, after enduring the pain for a bit I slept off, I woke up after the school bell rang for the third time for school dismissal while struggling to stand up from the chair I was sitting on, was when I heard Nma shrieking...
Nma was stripped off her clothes only left with lingerie, she was begging the Economics teacher to let her go just this once, but all the pleas fell on deaf ears, instead, he took out his belt and whipped her on her buttocks, which afterward had his way with her, I watched Nma beg and groan in pains, I understood all her dilemmas since I was once in her shoes, but she was only twelve.
I marveled at how our parents would live with us for years without even bother asking us how we were faring in school.
And I somehow blamed my parents for what I was passing through, the first time I came home with the bruises I got from Mr. Akin the Economics teacher, My mom never bothered asking how I got them, she only concluded that I took my silly behaviors to school, if only she had asked how maybe just maybe I would have told her about Mr. Akin.
During our last days in Junior High, Nma became pregnant, she was depressed and secluded, she alienate herself from everybody including me.
I tried reaching out to her on several occasions, but she just wouldn't let me in. I was confused, I pondered on what could make her draw lines between us, she would only find solace in her poems, and I never thought of reading one of the poems in the books she would always carry around.
The day before she passed on to the afterlife, Nma came to school, happy and energetic as she used to be, we spent a lot of time together she didn't want to go home after school.
During the break period that day, Nma left her most precious book where she wrote all her poems her darkest moment on my desk, I was tempted to open the book and see what was inside, the kind of poems she inscribed but I didn't instead I took the book to her, she stared at me for a while and asked...
"Did you read what's inside?"
She said in a feeble voice...
No, I didn't.
I said in a defensive voice
I don't invade people's privacy...
I added.
She looked rather disappointed but later filled her Face with smiles...
A few hours after debating whether or not to go home, she later succumbed to my request and said
"Let's go home"
She said as she held my hands tight, her hands were warm and she had a beautiful smile on her.
We walked down-home happy.
I wished I had opened that book, she wanted me to invade her privacy, but I didn't...
The Next day, I saw Nma's elder sis in school and they went straight to the principal's office, I somehow felt uncomfortable and curious about why they came, since it was odd seeing them in school like that.
A few minutes later, rumors begin to spread, that Nma was dead and she was pregnant...
I was shocked when I heard that news, my face went blank, fear crossed my face while sadness clouded my features, while fighting back tears, tears swamped my eyes and when I couldn't anymore, tears ran down my cheeks.
I couldn't think of not seeing Nma again and couldn't bear the thought, it was indecipherable.
I ran as fast as my legs could carry me to Nma's house and saw her covered with white apparel, and her book beside her, she had committed suicide, and all her feelings which she never told or showed to anyone were written down.
Her last words to me were "let's go home" but she left without me.
Rumors about a 12-year-old being pregnant and who committed suicide became the talk of the town, she was labeled irresponsible and a shame, no one talked about the fact that Mr. Akin did sexually assault her.
"What would a grown man with the full spec as a wife want in the body of a 12-year-old"
Even after her death no one believed her, Mr. Akin denied the fact he ever did, until I found the courage to speak up about mine, when I did two other girls in the age range 15 and 14 also came up and testified against him, he blamed it on the devil, though he was arrested, trialed and sentenced, Nma was still dead.
My parents felt ashamed of themselves, which they should be, and apologized, but Nma's parents never forgave themselves cause they also led her to her early grave.
Nma wrote
"When darkness engulfs me
I run to poems to find solace
When the baby in me cries
I hush its little voice,
For I have no choice
But if somehow I find light
Or just a glimpse of it,
I would follow.
But if somehow, your tiny voice is heard
We might be saved."
Listen to that silent voice, and you will hear a little cry.
Help save our girls
© Joyce Godswill