They either come back or they don't.
That's what you tell yourself. As you go through mundane days with so much of pain beating in your chest that you feel it will explode.

You strike days off your calendar,
waiting, going for a run,
picking up a new hobby,
while trying to numb that part of your brain
that refuses to forget
the little details of your skin.

Soon, you start sleeping
in the middle of the bed, learn how to get through the evenings alone,
go to cafes and cities alone,
you learn how to cook enough
dinner for yourself and just make
do without the kisses on your neck.

You learn... Adjust... And Accept...
The tumor of pain already exploded
when on one lonely night
you played her voice recording by mistake..
by mistake..
You thought you would die but you didn't.
Did you?

They either come back.. or they don't..
You survive.
© Anmol