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EMOTIONAL ABUSE
When I am finish on my work in the house, I sat down for a moment because I am so tired. There's a lot of works today, we just finished the holiday and a lot of things I need to fix.
"Mom? Where's my shoes?!"
"Mom? I can't find my towel!"
"Can I have 10 bucks mom, please?"
I can't focus on the other things because my kid keeps on calling me this and that. I deeply sigh and just give them what they need. This is a marriage life, what I am supposed to do? This is the life I chose because I love him.
I cooked our dinner and I let them eat first. I clean it so that my husband will eat later. I was just busy cleaning the table when I saw my husband walking, drunk.
"You drunk?" I said while holding his tie. He look at me. I sigh."You should eat now."
"You— I've been working non-stop to feed you and our kids, you are just here in the house doing nothing while I am outside of this fvcking house doing some errands to fvcking give you the money you need and the kids! I am tired!"
I stop for a moment and my lips parted because of what he said. I shook my head and shock is visible in my eyes.
"You shouldn't marry someone if you know you can't do it in a right way. Did you think that staying in the house is easy? Did you really think?"
"Of course! You are just here sitting, cleaning, and—"
"And budgeting the money for the foods! Bills! Groceries! Cleaning everything, giving you all you need and did you think it's easy?!" I wipe my tears as I feel my body so tired. I didn't sleep well because I still have things to finish."You got payed for your hardwork but me? No. You payed me nothing but I just let you because this is my responsibility! You do your responsibility too but payed! I am tired too but I stayed!"
That night our relationship changed. We've been married for 10 years and acted like this? Now that we have 5 kids? He changed because he feed 6 people using his money?
"You fvcking useless!"
He shouted at me in my face but he didn't hit me.
"I will decrease the money I give!"
He withhold the money but he didn't me.
"You are just nothing but a woman who needs a man to fvcking live!"
He insulted me but he didn't hit me.
"Dianna! You whore!"
He called me names when he is angry but he didn't me.
"Damn it!"
He smashed things into the wall when he is mad but he didn't hit me.
"No one cares about you but me, because if I didn't care about you— you ended up sleeping on the street!"
He told me no one cares about me but he didn't hit me.
"I saw your husband in the mall earlier, he's with woman. Are you two still married?"
He flirted with another woman but he didn't hit me.
I cried at my room, thinking my worth and questioning my value. He made me feel so worthless. He made me feel like I don't deserve to be love.
Emotional abuse is still abuse. He maybe don't hit you physical but what he did is more than a hit— bruises and wounds heal, words that it stab in our heart won't.
© Skyler
"Mom? Where's my shoes?!"
"Mom? I can't find my towel!"
"Can I have 10 bucks mom, please?"
I can't focus on the other things because my kid keeps on calling me this and that. I deeply sigh and just give them what they need. This is a marriage life, what I am supposed to do? This is the life I chose because I love him.
I cooked our dinner and I let them eat first. I clean it so that my husband will eat later. I was just busy cleaning the table when I saw my husband walking, drunk.
"You drunk?" I said while holding his tie. He look at me. I sigh."You should eat now."
"You— I've been working non-stop to feed you and our kids, you are just here in the house doing nothing while I am outside of this fvcking house doing some errands to fvcking give you the money you need and the kids! I am tired!"
I stop for a moment and my lips parted because of what he said. I shook my head and shock is visible in my eyes.
"You shouldn't marry someone if you know you can't do it in a right way. Did you think that staying in the house is easy? Did you really think?"
"Of course! You are just here sitting, cleaning, and—"
"And budgeting the money for the foods! Bills! Groceries! Cleaning everything, giving you all you need and did you think it's easy?!" I wipe my tears as I feel my body so tired. I didn't sleep well because I still have things to finish."You got payed for your hardwork but me? No. You payed me nothing but I just let you because this is my responsibility! You do your responsibility too but payed! I am tired too but I stayed!"
That night our relationship changed. We've been married for 10 years and acted like this? Now that we have 5 kids? He changed because he feed 6 people using his money?
"You fvcking useless!"
He shouted at me in my face but he didn't hit me.
"I will decrease the money I give!"
He withhold the money but he didn't me.
"You are just nothing but a woman who needs a man to fvcking live!"
He insulted me but he didn't hit me.
"Dianna! You whore!"
He called me names when he is angry but he didn't me.
"Damn it!"
He smashed things into the wall when he is mad but he didn't hit me.
"No one cares about you but me, because if I didn't care about you— you ended up sleeping on the street!"
He told me no one cares about me but he didn't hit me.
"I saw your husband in the mall earlier, he's with woman. Are you two still married?"
He flirted with another woman but he didn't hit me.
I cried at my room, thinking my worth and questioning my value. He made me feel so worthless. He made me feel like I don't deserve to be love.
Emotional abuse is still abuse. He maybe don't hit you physical but what he did is more than a hit— bruises and wounds heal, words that it stab in our heart won't.
© Skyler
