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Mistakes done in relationship
Love is a beautiful thing that can happen to anyone. It feels good to love and be loved back, to have a special someone in life to create memories with.
Love is like a seed that you sow, nurture it into a young seedling and it grows into a plant. Love develops depending on how you nurture it.
Love is a feeling that you have towards someone. Someone may ask, do I like or love him? When you like something let's say a flower, you will pluck it, but if you love you will water it, nurture it. Liking may just be a crush. Loving, one wants to spend time with them, do things that make them happy, have butterflies on seeing them and much more.
Just like a seed which goes through stages as it develops so is love. Each of this stages require some input from both parties. Love should be a two way thing.
However, not all love stories are bound to be. This may be due to some of the mistakes below that partners make knowingly or unknowingly in the journey of love, end up hurting each other.
One is, getting into a relationship for the wrong reasons such as peer pressure, as a revenge for previous ex, afraid of being lonely among other reasons. Wrong entry into a relationship mostly is with the wrong person and at a wrong timing. Peer pressure should not make one jump into a relationship with just anyone in order to fit in in a particular group, be like so and so. Love happens at any age and time, no need to rush things going into something you are not prepared for thus disappointments.
After a break up, give yourself time to heal, do not rush to get into a relationship fresh from a break up. Most likely you will carry on the hurt into the new relationship, you are yet to give yourself time to cool off, figure yourself out, get over your ex.
Avoid getting into a relationship because you are afraid of being lonely. Most likely you will have high expectations of the other person, to be your source of happiness, be always with you, give you attention and affection, whereby if the person falls short of your expectations you will end up being disappointed, blaming the person. Before getting into a relationship, love yourself first, make yourself happy, embrace yourself, do not expect to get everything from your partner. We are all humans and humans disappoint at times. If your happiness is tied to someone else, what if he is no longer there? Learn to enjoy life by yourself, happy soul attracts a happy soul.
Second, over expectations of the other person. Do not enter into a relationship with high fetched expectations only to be disappointed. Accept that love has its ups and down, they would not be there all the time, before you met them they had their own lives, do not expect them to suddenly adjust to your liking. Do not expect everything to be given always. It's a give and receive affair. Love is a two way thing hence both should make contributions to the relationship, sharing of roles not to let one to solely plan everything out; where to go for a date, what to gift, recall birthdays and other special events, start conversation, check up on you. You also have to reciprocate, that way none is burdened or seems to take advantage of the other's feelings.
Third, making comparisons of your partner with other people or previous ex or comparing your current relationship with previous. Everyone got their shortcomings and man is to err. No one is perfect. Anyone is bound to make mistake. Once you break up with someone, leave everything in the past, heal before venturing into a new relationship. Instead of comparing and complaining try to understand the other person, have a talk on what you prefer in a relationship. When they make mistakes correct them with love. Comparing them makes them feel lesser, inadequate which is not a good feeling. Be contented with what they have to offer, love them for who they are not what they can offer.
Fourth, lack of communication, at the very beginning of a relationship, the conversation is heated, fast replies, so much attention and affection. Most relationships, with time it all fades...why is that? For a long lasting love, it's not all about winning her/him over, having a partner and settling down, you have to keep the love burning, same sparks as the very beginning should be maintained. Flirt with her even if she is already yours. Keep up doing what you did to win them over. Girl keep up the glow, the routines, do not start looking haggard now that you have got him. It's a man's pride to see that his girlfriend is the envy of many. For guys too, hit the gym like you used to, buy her flowers and that vanilla cake she used to like back then, remember her special dates, go out for dinners. Try new things together, learn some routines, a new game. Check up on each other, share your daily with each other. When problems or argument arise, most walk out, it should not be so, talk things out, admit mistakes, ask for forgiveness, have a heart to forgive and not let the mistake occur again if you are at fault. Sorry may be an everyday word but if sincere it means everything, it solves most problems. Do not hesitate to say sorry when at fault. Learn to admit to your mistakes. Learn to forgive too.
Fifth, trust issues is another problem which brings about insecurities. When your partner decides to go out, you wanna stalk him, go through his phone, find out who he hangs out with, who he gets in touch with. If you have doubt on anything try talking it out instead of sneakily stalking. One needs to trust their partners, and not to break that trust since once trust is lost, it is hard to earn it back. Also do not give your partner reason to doubt you. Be open with each other, share whatever problems may be, your insecurities, assure each other, be a team in everything. Do not believe everything that is said against your partner, not everyone wishes you well. Before going against your partner based on a rumour you heard, confirm, try work out.
Last but not least, if the relationship gets toxic, do not hesitate to leave. Why stay and hurt? If you see red flags, watch out. Most people are tempted to stay put in the relationship hoping things work out. Things do work out in other small issues which are bound to arise but how do you solve disrespect, violence, trash talking, abusive relationship. Walk out you deserve better. Avoid negative energy, peace of mind is more important.
Lastly, most tend to be clingy. Being clingy type is not bad, you love them but do not suffocate them with love. Before you came into their lives, they had hobbies, talents, friends, relatives, game they love, work, studies, give them time to do all those too. To go out with friends, have reunions. What happens when you have something whole time? You get used to it, get bored or even lose interest. Give your partner time to miss you. Meanwhile engage in some activities too. Do not be a boring partner, be you, do other things that make you happy besides your partner. You got a whole life with them ahead. Create memories with family and friends. Do not neglect your partner though. Learn to have your personal time and give your partner privacy.
All the best to new love doves. Rekindle your love in every stage of your relationship, keep the sparks, be positive. Love got a lot to offer do not miss out.Try be the best partner to your partner, appreciate what you have. Treasure it while it still lasts.
Love is like a seed that you sow, nurture it into a young seedling and it grows into a plant. Love develops depending on how you nurture it.
Love is a feeling that you have towards someone. Someone may ask, do I like or love him? When you like something let's say a flower, you will pluck it, but if you love you will water it, nurture it. Liking may just be a crush. Loving, one wants to spend time with them, do things that make them happy, have butterflies on seeing them and much more.
Just like a seed which goes through stages as it develops so is love. Each of this stages require some input from both parties. Love should be a two way thing.
However, not all love stories are bound to be. This may be due to some of the mistakes below that partners make knowingly or unknowingly in the journey of love, end up hurting each other.
One is, getting into a relationship for the wrong reasons such as peer pressure, as a revenge for previous ex, afraid of being lonely among other reasons. Wrong entry into a relationship mostly is with the wrong person and at a wrong timing. Peer pressure should not make one jump into a relationship with just anyone in order to fit in in a particular group, be like so and so. Love happens at any age and time, no need to rush things going into something you are not prepared for thus disappointments.
After a break up, give yourself time to heal, do not rush to get into a relationship fresh from a break up. Most likely you will carry on the hurt into the new relationship, you are yet to give yourself time to cool off, figure yourself out, get over your ex.
Avoid getting into a relationship because you are afraid of being lonely. Most likely you will have high expectations of the other person, to be your source of happiness, be always with you, give you attention and affection, whereby if the person falls short of your expectations you will end up being disappointed, blaming the person. Before getting into a relationship, love yourself first, make yourself happy, embrace yourself, do not expect to get everything from your partner. We are all humans and humans disappoint at times. If your happiness is tied to someone else, what if he is no longer there? Learn to enjoy life by yourself, happy soul attracts a happy soul.
Second, over expectations of the other person. Do not enter into a relationship with high fetched expectations only to be disappointed. Accept that love has its ups and down, they would not be there all the time, before you met them they had their own lives, do not expect them to suddenly adjust to your liking. Do not expect everything to be given always. It's a give and receive affair. Love is a two way thing hence both should make contributions to the relationship, sharing of roles not to let one to solely plan everything out; where to go for a date, what to gift, recall birthdays and other special events, start conversation, check up on you. You also have to reciprocate, that way none is burdened or seems to take advantage of the other's feelings.
Third, making comparisons of your partner with other people or previous ex or comparing your current relationship with previous. Everyone got their shortcomings and man is to err. No one is perfect. Anyone is bound to make mistake. Once you break up with someone, leave everything in the past, heal before venturing into a new relationship. Instead of comparing and complaining try to understand the other person, have a talk on what you prefer in a relationship. When they make mistakes correct them with love. Comparing them makes them feel lesser, inadequate which is not a good feeling. Be contented with what they have to offer, love them for who they are not what they can offer.
Fourth, lack of communication, at the very beginning of a relationship, the conversation is heated, fast replies, so much attention and affection. Most relationships, with time it all fades...why is that? For a long lasting love, it's not all about winning her/him over, having a partner and settling down, you have to keep the love burning, same sparks as the very beginning should be maintained. Flirt with her even if she is already yours. Keep up doing what you did to win them over. Girl keep up the glow, the routines, do not start looking haggard now that you have got him. It's a man's pride to see that his girlfriend is the envy of many. For guys too, hit the gym like you used to, buy her flowers and that vanilla cake she used to like back then, remember her special dates, go out for dinners. Try new things together, learn some routines, a new game. Check up on each other, share your daily with each other. When problems or argument arise, most walk out, it should not be so, talk things out, admit mistakes, ask for forgiveness, have a heart to forgive and not let the mistake occur again if you are at fault. Sorry may be an everyday word but if sincere it means everything, it solves most problems. Do not hesitate to say sorry when at fault. Learn to admit to your mistakes. Learn to forgive too.
Fifth, trust issues is another problem which brings about insecurities. When your partner decides to go out, you wanna stalk him, go through his phone, find out who he hangs out with, who he gets in touch with. If you have doubt on anything try talking it out instead of sneakily stalking. One needs to trust their partners, and not to break that trust since once trust is lost, it is hard to earn it back. Also do not give your partner reason to doubt you. Be open with each other, share whatever problems may be, your insecurities, assure each other, be a team in everything. Do not believe everything that is said against your partner, not everyone wishes you well. Before going against your partner based on a rumour you heard, confirm, try work out.
Last but not least, if the relationship gets toxic, do not hesitate to leave. Why stay and hurt? If you see red flags, watch out. Most people are tempted to stay put in the relationship hoping things work out. Things do work out in other small issues which are bound to arise but how do you solve disrespect, violence, trash talking, abusive relationship. Walk out you deserve better. Avoid negative energy, peace of mind is more important.
Lastly, most tend to be clingy. Being clingy type is not bad, you love them but do not suffocate them with love. Before you came into their lives, they had hobbies, talents, friends, relatives, game they love, work, studies, give them time to do all those too. To go out with friends, have reunions. What happens when you have something whole time? You get used to it, get bored or even lose interest. Give your partner time to miss you. Meanwhile engage in some activities too. Do not be a boring partner, be you, do other things that make you happy besides your partner. You got a whole life with them ahead. Create memories with family and friends. Do not neglect your partner though. Learn to have your personal time and give your partner privacy.
All the best to new love doves. Rekindle your love in every stage of your relationship, keep the sparks, be positive. Love got a lot to offer do not miss out.Try be the best partner to your partner, appreciate what you have. Treasure it while it still lasts.
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