Hey.......
I've been trying to call you....
I don't know why you won't pick my calls up anymore but I miss you....
I know we've drifted apart and...
now I have to deal with this broken heart...
It's funny you always tell me to pick myself up...
dress those wounds because I can't erase the scars...
the truth is... I wasn't ready for this part.
Even though it made me realize I just lost something ...something I never gained.
Why does your last gift had to be this undeserving pain?

I want to blame myself and I know you're hoping that i do but I can't...
After I dropped the standards so low...
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU MISS THE BAR!?
You want me to BEG you to come back...
BEG you to LOVE ME...
BEG you to stay this time and DON'T EVER leave... SWEAR to you I'll aLwAyS do right...
SWEAR to you that you'll be my OnLy ray of light...
give you my heart so in the end when i stop begging you... you can toss it from the heights...
because in your dreams without your love my little spark of life would not survive.

I wish it was so easy to break this cycle.
The cycle of always wanting you,
just so i could easily erase
EVERY SINGLE OUNCE OF
LOVE I HAVE FOR YOU,
wake up one day and not GiVe a FuCk,
!NOT! !ONE! !FUCK! ...
about not having your attention or validation.
I wish it was so easy like you walking out of my life.

You say you "lOvE mE"... but you don't.
The truth is,
you love how vulnerable and weak i am to you,
that you became SoOoOo ObSeSsEd
with my constant emotional torment,
when you chose to not give me what I dEsPeRaTeLy believe i needed...
And it made you feel like you're someone... A pErSoN...
When in reality...
YOU'RE A PIECE OF !SHIT! WHO DOESN'T DESERVE LOVE!...
my love ...

This time i won't beg...
this time I won't swear...
This is where I draw the line...
I'm done being a character in your twisted game.

© aiidisconnected