I've got sunshine in my pocket
I'm just stuck here in my zone
Feeling completely out of place
With no where I can call home
How everything has been lately
I'm too scared to answer my phone

Holding back from a life I should have
Watching my children as they grow
Because everyone always has to mess shit up
Making decisions based off what they think they know

About me

Thinking they know what's best for me
When they don't even know who I am
Trying to keep up with an image they wanted to see
Though, it has me lost
Trying to remember who I used to be
And what was it?
That I thought I believed?

In the midst of seeming crazy
Cause I did what I could
To protect my babies
Tried to show them
How to act like ladies
And how to protect each other
Defend yourselves,
And to be a team

Truth be told
It seems like there is no way to protect them
From all of you
Cause you'll go to any lengths it takes
To get what you want
And what you think is right
I don't want to give up though
I've got to win this fight

This whole thing goes back to way back when
To when I was in invisible to you
And misbehaved to get your attention
All those lonely desperate and suicidal nights
You never tried to even notice
I finally gave up trying to mention

When I asked for your help
You slammed the door
Never once thought even for a second
Maybe I just really miss
How things used to be before

Before our family was ripped to pieces
Relentlessly I tried to gather it all back up
To try to mend it all together again
And seal the creases

Instead

I was completely ostracized
By each and every one of you
And I became the family joke
Here we are years later
And that joke is beyond old

Inside of me is a raging fire
Now as I try to escape your trap
I've got to stick to being far away
Cause soon this will all be over
And I'm never coming back

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