You said I could trust you.
after 20 years of being together, but deep inside something told me that I should never put my trust into you.
My gut was warning me.
My whole family that always argued about everything, but they all agreed when it cake to you.
but how was I to know.
Perhaps I never bothered to listen.
I chose to ignore it.
My heart chose to follow you.
I gave you all the love that I had inside of me.
I should of been smart and noticed that the way you started to treat me did not match with the words that you seldom spoke to me.
As a matter of fact you didn't talk to me with love very much at all. Everytime I brought it up, it only upset you to the point where you actually hit me for the very first time and soon short after you weren't very remorseful. You didn't beg me for another chance. Come to think of it, after 2 weeks I was the one begging for your return.
It truly is no ones fault other than my own.
I should have known.
I should have believed my feelings that I was feeling.
Something inside of me was telling me that you were involved with another.
I even felt that you might be in love with this woman.
but If I have to be honest, I wasnt ready to come to terms let alone face the fact that the man that I had spent the last 20 years loving with all my heart, the man that had fathered my 2 kids, wasn't in love with me any longer. I couldn't even start to think that way, it would drive me crazy.
The feelings that you once had for me slowly slipped away and your heart no longer belonged to me.
It tore my world apart. and the saddest of it all was you didn't love me you didn't care.
© Stephanie M.H.
© Stephanie mh