Kick me, kill me
And ensure that I die
Break me, crush me
I don't wanna be alive

Don't save me
Don't help me
Allow me to drown

Don't touch me
Don't pull me
Let me lay on the ground

Let me burn
Let me cry
Allow me to fade away

Don't love me
Don't tell me
That I will be ok

I've shaken hands with the devil
I'm being dragged to hell
I'm just a dying ember
An empty shell

I have no heart
I have no brain
I'm just bones but I'm still in pain

I feel nothing
I'm breathing toxic air
I am nothing
Dysphoria and despair

I claw at my skin
I hate it, I hate it
I tear apart my flesh
It's dirty, it's dirty

I break my mirror
I hate her, I hate her
I cut my body
I hate them, I hate them

They keep talking and talking
Shut up, shut up
I'm scared to see them, for them to see me
Go away, go away

They mock my stutter
I. Can't. Breathe
They mock my face
I. Can't. Breathe.

They scream at me insults.
I. Can't. Breathe.
How can I face them?
I. Can't. Breathe.

I am a monster.
I feel no remorse.
I hurt them, I break them
It's pleasure, I suppose

I'm not interested, not anymore
I'm not sleeping, not anymore
I'm not feeling, not anymore
I'm not strong, not anymore

I'm having too much
But I had so little
I'm too fat
I'm too thin
I don't want it, I'll throw it up anyway
Don't force me, I can't do it today
I can't stop, so don't tell me to
Please don't mock me I'm trying my best
I didn't choose this, allow me to rest

I know it's not there, but I can't help but look back
I know it's not coming for me but I can't help but think so
I keeping looking back, just to make sure
I know I accuse too much, but I really don't know
I can't tell what's real from what's not
And i don't know how to stop

I know it was long ago
But I still remember
It haunts my day and night
How long ago was December?
Don't judge me for not being able to move on
It's not so easy if only you knew
It's hard to carry on, what should I do?

I don't like touch, what's so hard to understand?
I'm scared of needles, the dark and small spaces.
Don't come any closer, don't corner me or turn of the light.

It's too high, it's too red, it's too loud and too bright.
Storms aren't my thing don't ask me why
No deep waters, nothing with blood, spiders are terrible.

I fear falling inlove, I fear being alone
Can you tell me why?
Cause I don't know

I can't greet people
I hate the crowds
I prefer to be alone
I can't handle loud noises
Everyone's yells or shouts
I can't handle speaking to too many people
Please pull me out

The voices, the monsters
Everything abreeze
It seems easy to you
But it's difficult for me

I crave attention, because I lack love
I crave loneliness cause it's all I know
Don't be mad at me, I'm angry at myself enough
I'm clingy, sensitive and easily hurt
Disgust and demean is my luxury and wealth
Please love me more than I hate myself

My mind is a mental prison and my heart has several cracks
I'm so damaged and two steps from the edge
All my haters I beg you
Don't push me over it

Gangsters, your not the only one walking around with a loaded gun
My demons have surrounded me
There's nowhere to run
I guess today is the day I become a murderer
My own blood on my hands
Why did I do this?
I don't think you'll understand.


© WarningKoala