You don't understand.
do you have anxiety?
Do you have depression?
Are you afraid?
is your heart heavy?

It's easy to feel okay,
it's hard too keep it that way.

It's easy for the broken heart to hurt again.
And just a little pain will crumble what you've built.
The tower your on. The happiness your enjoying.
crumbles to the depths of despair.

soo much time goes by and for long times you're fine.. But then the Crack opens a bit, and the sorrow fills your heart.

Fear keeps you from walking too far from safety.
From swimming too far.

when your too scared to show someone how bad you've been hurt. how much your hearts been broken. All the scars.

And all you want is too be seen, to be acknowledged, for the pain to be validated.

But damaged goods are never enough.

Just wallow in the dark, and cry in the corner. no one will see you, no one will care enough to dig deeper.

You're soo good at hiding it behind a smile anyways. for so long the pain has become normal. Although it's mascaraded as strength, it's all fear. Fear to let someone in again, just for them to hurt you.

you understand loss, and you understand regret, but you don't understand the fear of not being enough.
The Fear of letting someone see you and turn away.

You just don't understand.

You don't understand the time passed with the heavy rain weighing you down. and forcing a smile.

You dont understand a trigger, that'll set off in an instance and knock you down.

The struggle to claw your self back up, over, and over again. Just for your foundation to crumble.

you don't understand

You don't understand the time, it takes and the energy. I'm just so tired.

you don't understand how much it hurts to hold back the tears, so that no one will see you vulnerable again.

It's soo hard to be voulenerable, to be weak.
I used to be proud of being able to show my vulnerability. Now I just hide that part of my self.

You don't understand, you never did.

You just don't understand.

You never will.
© Whin21