I only wanted you,
Your honesty.
Or so I thought.
You knew I would have died by your truths,
I believed in you. Absolutely...
I love you still... Now.
But you were like a shadow slipping deep into a dark void.
You took my belief in what was a solid foundation of what we were meant to be.
I haven't the strength to even try anymore.
I don't know what I could have done.
I suppose I could have wished that you felt your own truths.
Letting the lies pierce your soul with the betrayal of your own doing.
It would be okay with me if your reality became a distorted illusion.
I'm fine with you telling yourself the comforting lies that help you sleep at night, only to find yourself, so miserably,
coming to the conclusion you're
living on the lies you that have been your mantra the entire time.
I also think having to pick
up the pieces of your shattered
life and realizing that there's
a gaping hole where that missing
fragment of your soul should be would
do you well.
Nothing like being held captive in your own fresh personal hell.
Picking up one shattered piece after another. Never finding the most important part.
The one you created with that very first lie.
The one that makes for those long, lonely nights, writhing on sweat soaked sheets.
You know the one.
I hope when you look at yourself in the mirror and profess your love and swear it's the truth,
then the shadows on the wall will begin to slowly turn on you.
Maybe then you could know how you took something for granted that you never deserved but were gifted so unselfishly.
Maybe you will know that feeling of
wanting a love that you can't have because you refuse to get over your selfishness all the while you, circling the drain of denial, can't see your true self.
And
One last thing.
I hope you see what I saw in you when I looked into your eyes.
A beautiful soul that deserved my
love, only he couldn't see beyond his own lies.




© Morgan West