you can say
please say what you want to say
and you can breathe
if you really still feel the need to
but I won't wait
I can't wait anymore for you to change
- to speak the truth
I don't know how to do anything
but I don't crave anymore
to see you extending your hand
I guess you couldn't
even if you wanted

I hope you know
that the air you breathe out
is the drug that keeps me stuck
yet you sit there and demand
that I bring myself out of this rut

you tell me that I'm crazy
use words, so demeaning
then you ask me if I hear myself
you shake me, push me or
better yet - ignore me
you are why I can't sleep at night
I can't let you win this fight
push
shove
hover
let go
just let me go

remember when he'd throw me in the air
and fix my teddy bear's ear
but right now I'm here
and it's taken quite a while
to get these words out on paper
I bet never once, did you think
"I can save her"
ready to cut the bullshit
stuck here with my hands up
and saying this is it
I'm ready for my life to start
the way it should've been
I realize now how alone I am
realized nobody gave a damn
the revolution has caused me to see
the only one I need is me

I'm not suicidal
I just want to feel something
that I know is good and right
I'm not suicidal
I just don't want to remember anything
I don't want to hurt myself
I just want to feel something, something
I'd just rather not be here
I'd rather never have existed
than to spend another day convincing
my own self everything is okay
picking it back up hour after hour
it merely starts to sour
I ain't suicidal
I just wanna be comfortable
in my own skin
I'm just lost without my old idols

push and shove
hover and push and shove

communication is the key
if you won't talk
then this door is locked
and I might as well leave