I'm proud for once I did not follow

It was a terribly difficult pill to swallow

I didn't say frozen there or wallow

This is all pretty unusual for me

I often react as though I'm 3

Insisting this cannot be and overreacting by a huge degree.

I'd beg and plead him not to leave

Many times the same loss I'd have to grieve

Felt like without him I couldn't breathe

It was a terrible mistake to be unable understand these feelings were actually fake

These strong feelings I just couldn't shake.

If my heart at all healed it was doomed to rebreak

I was lost in a fight to feel like I mattered

Only to have the core of my self esteem shattered

Inside my mind was torn up and tattered

My world crashing down around me clattered

A pattern that cycled round and never ending

Fighting for my rights or of my worth defending

Never a fully healed heart always broken and mending

While on his absent love I was co-depending

#onesidedlove