Trapped in my mind
My sight is blind

Searching for something
Don't know what I'm trying to find
Everything from my past
I left behind
Emotion's are swinging from Angry to kind

There's no in between of the shit that I've been through

The things that I've seen
How could they do things so ungodly
And not see how it's mean?
And completely unfair

Said it would be better
When I got clean
But reality struck my spleen
Making me fall straight to my knees

Now my motivation is running away from me
Don't know where to go
Or who I want to be
If only I could replay the future I once seen

A vision from God
That no one believed

Life was completely content and comfortable
A never ending peace

Though the people I love are oblivious to how they treat
A girl who once dreamed for their love in return
Briefly noticed by the time I tried to leave

Sabotage my life with the control they seek
Taking my only purpose God blessed me with
Knowing my girls are exactly what I need

In this life to actually survive

Their control however resembles a shameful greed
As the riches from within my soul
Began to bleed

So I ran away to a place where
The river runs deep

My Life as a song that plays on repeat
Caught in the depths of it
Ma, it's exactly what you think

It's much worse though
Than you'd ever want to believe
The truth reveals itself
When I pull up my sleeve

What can I say though?
The river runs deep

Weeks pass by with minimal sleep
Fighting for your life
Cause every dope man is a creep
The lengths they go to will forever taunt your dreams

Wishing there was a middle point
Between being high and what's reality
Instead of feeling like I suffer from a split personality
And for me living this way is my horrific fatality

All of it started when you doubted my goals and denied what I could potentially be
Alone and afraid
Failure is all you were willing to see

At this point I don't think any of you deserve to know
What I could have freed
Upon your lives
I was given directions to our true destiny

The one where we fell back together
And reunited as a family

I wanted it so desperately
But no one found it possible
For once in a miracle

To just believe in me

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