i hope you grow up
and i never hear a thing about it.
i hope you find peace
and think of when you felt it with me.

realizing that im better than
than the year i fought for hits home
but it lets me know 
that i deserve better.
that self care and healing
trumps wanting to be cared for.

i dont talk about my side of things
but i know that i made you feel
smothered while we dated
and all i can do is apologize
and grow with someone else.

i understand my flaws
but ive kept making excuses
for your past mistakes.
and that little bug in my brain
telling me youll
make me feel small again.

you told me your happiness
took precedence
i realized mine needed to take
precedent too.
and to stop healing for others
and to heal for myself.

i hope i meet someone else
that im not scared to feel with.
i will not put a timer on my healing
but im still grieving
a subdued feeling.

i hope you find peace in standing still,
that the next city over
doesnt always need you.
i think that was your...