Is this the last ride of my life?
When I forget my recent past,
About you and me having coffee,
While you enjoy teasing me,
For drenching my cookies in coffee,

About the little rose plants we grew,
So that you would pluck one everyday,
To express how much you love me,
And end up getting yourself scolded,

About our 40 years of togetherness,
The fragrances we filled within,
And our fights in the hallway,
Just to make sure we never left our shadows alone,

Is this the last ride of my life?
When my dementia eats up our memories,
Where I take my last breath in your lap,
And kiss your wrinkled face for the last time...

~•~

Is this my final heartbeat?
I wonder if I'll step back into my innocent regret
I wonder if I'd rewire the strand of our fate
How you used to linger like a lavander haze
How lovely you look on your dress and commitment.
 
In the morning, I see your phantom
Visiting the early stage of my acceptance
As I stir a cup of coffee, I hear the aroma of yours
Dissolved like smoke, stayed in my dirty kitchen
Freshed up with laughter, tears, and rebirth.
 
I wonder
What else can my cold hands hold
Except for the remnants of your gold.
 
I wonder
What else can my cold hands hold
Except for the paper hands on my white world.
 
In the evening, I see your phantom
I wonder why my pillow tastes like acid rain
I wonder how the blanket loses its warmth for me.
 
And before I shut my eyes,
I tell God to put some concrete in my heart
So tomorrow I won't remember how
You made me smile.



@Rajvik
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